It seems like every day I find a new meme online about some guy who was "friend zoned." Our generation seems to be obsessed with the idea that every girl is a potential girlfriend/hookup/whatever. The issue is this: women are independent creatures. It's damaging to every gender to consider women nothing more than a potential partner rather than a possible friend or colleague. It forces men and women to only be able to communicate as long as there is an unspoken understanding that there is a relationship (or some kind of physical reward) in the future.
More importantly, it encourages men to feel entitled to a woman's time and attention. Our culture essentially broadcasts the idea that men deserve women's interest—and that women who dare to deny men are b*tches. As soon as a woman makes it clear that she is interested in friendship instead of companionship or physical intimacy, she is labeled a heartbreaker. Never mind the fact that she has every right to simply be disinterested in a romantic relationship.
When we investigate the "friend zone," we find a very sinister undertone: women who say no are cruel and bad. By perpetuating this tired line, we continue to tell women that their opinion is irrelevant when it comes to men's feelings. It's as if not wanting a relationship with someone makes you a bad person. Therefore, we encourage women to forgo their own feelings for the sake of being nice or "not leading him on." It puts an immense amount of peer pressure on women to not express their feelings and to accept male attention whether they actually want it or not.
Moreover, it's even more ridiculous when men claim that their time has been wasted. That phrase alone is incredibly arrogant, because it insinuates that a man's time is worth more than a woman's. Additionally, it tells me that a guy wouldn't have been kind or put forth any effort had he known that I was not interested in anything beyond friendship. When a guy complains that he's been "friend zoned" and then goes on to say that "she wasted my time," it immediately raises red flags. The time that a woman allows you to spend with her is worth something, even if she doesn't care to enter into a romantic commitment with you. The fact that you two are not going to become boyfriend and girlfriend does not negate all of the memories you've made or the time you've had together.
Give up on the friend zone. Women do not owe men time and attention. Guys, you can be friends with women without expecting anything from them.
