We all know the phrase "to put someone in the friend zone."
The "friend zone" is a metaphorical place that women banish men they are not romantically or sexually interested in. We would say it in high school, joking about our guy friends. But as adults, we need to put this demeaning label far away from our friendships. It is childish, sexist, and allows men to objectify women.
The friend zone is honestly just a made-up excuse by men to cradle their fragile egos because they cannot deal with rejection. I'm sorry to all the men out there, but not every woman is going to find you attractive and claiming you're in the metaphorical friend zone is immature. Learn the word "no" and stop taking rejection as a stab to the heart. "Just friends" should be enough.
Being "put in the friend zone" is the justification men make when they are turned down by a woman. There doesn't need to be a zone between "friends" and "more than friends". This implies that the relationship can still sway to "more than friends" which, in the case of most plutonic male-female relationships, is not going to happen. Take the L and sit down buddy.
The friend zone essentially means that a man expects some form of sexual reciprocation for his kindness. He certainly can't be "just a friend". Claiming they're in the friend zone allows men to decide their own meaning to you. Heads up, I am not a vending machine you put kindness coins into until sex falls out. I'm sorry your narcissistic ego is bruised, but I owe you nothing. We can be friends, take it or leave it.
The worst perpetrators of this phenomenon are the self-proclaimed "nice guys". They act as though offering kindness and allowing a woman to trust them means they are deserved of a reward for their friendship. They act as if the friend zone is some death-camp that they are eternally incarcerated in. Sorry to burst your bubble, but the friend zone isn't Guantanamo Bay (although it would be just as hard to escape).
For all you self-proclaimed "nice guys" out there, this one is for you. The phrase "nice guys finish last" is pretty damn true, and I'll tell you why.
Self-proclaimed "nice guys" claim to be the antithesis of the douchey guys that girls fall for - but they are just as sexist (however, without the social skills or rippling abs). "Nice guys" put themselves in the prison of the friend zone with their true motives hidden under the guise of friendship. Women choose these guys as a friend because they don't make their move. "Nice guys" might be respectful to women, sure, but you can be respectful and still get the girl. Male-female friendship doesn't work when one wants to know what the other would look like naked.
Controversially, I propose to you the concept that male-female friendship can occur without arrogant male entitlement. I believe that men and woman can forge a friendship - only when one doesn't take rejection from the other as the end-all of their existence. Ladies and gentlemen, the platonic friendship. The concept of actual male-female platonic friendship - as inconceivable as it may be to my male readers - means that you must set aside your entitlement and narcissism, realize that you are not God's gift to women, and be a decent human. It's not platonic if you're still trying to tap dat ass.
Honestly, the friend zone is just a self-destructive coping mechanism that allows men to rationalize why they are undesirable to a woman. The friend zone perpetuates the idea that women are objects to be earned and demonizes any female who dares to make friends with a guy without the intention of sleeping with him. This is an immature way to handle relationships as an adult. The friend zone isn't a thing anymore. Stop dwelling on what you wish would happen, and instead pursue what can happen.
You'll thank me later.
