Heartbreak is an inevitable part of life. Any time we feel love, there's a possibility of heartbreak. Throughout my life, I have experienced a great deal of heart ache. Whether that be the loss of a family member, the family pet or a teenage romance, there is pain in goodbyes. In life it is expected that we will say many goodbyes. This is one of the necessary evils in life.
My worst heartbreak came in the form of my best friend. Her and I met in the sixth grade. By the end of junior year, we became inseparable. Like most best friends, we had our fair share of inside jokes, secret glances, and gossip. It was the two of us against the world. At the beginning of my senior year, I had reached what became a very dark time in my life. When I was at my worst, all I wanted was my best friend. I would call her crying more days than not. She was the only person who could calm me down. But in the midst of all my stress and anxiety, I forgot that she had her own life too. When she stopped answering my calls, I thought I was imposing. She had her own stress, her own happiness, and her own life to worry about. She didn't need my constant breakdowns on top of that.
After a while, I sat down with her, and I cried with her. We tried for a while to work things out, but truthfully, we were in different places in our lives. She couldn't be there for me, and I couldn't keep intruding on her life. I ended up texting her and temporarily pausing our friendship -just until I got better again. What we thought was a temporary fix, ended up being over a year of us not speaking.
The hardest part was losing the one person I felt comfortable with, the one person I trusted. Any time something good happened, I wanted to call her. Any time I was overwhelmed with sadness, I wanted to call her. Any time I felt anything, she was the first person that came to mind. It hurt knowing that in order to better myself, I had to lose my better half.
When I originally sent the text, I didn't understand the effect it would have on me. I didn't know losing my best friend would be one of the worst pains I have ever felt. Neither of us really did anything wrong, but circumstance caused a great friendship to turn it's course. Ours was a friendship I thought would last forever, but in order to fix my own problems, I had to let a good part of my life go. Eventually both of us moved on from the pain. And our memories are still something I enjoy looking back on and remembering.
