Freshman Feels

Freshman Feels

Week 10...
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"The best four years of your life" constantly echoes in my mind. Sometimes it feels as if you have to force college to be the best time of your life, because that's just what everyone tells you.

I was the first out of my friends to move in, so basically I was the guinea pig. I had to be the one to tell them "how it is" and "what to expect." It's hard because even if your having trouble adapting, you don't want to be that friend that hates college. Not gonna lie, I was extremely sad to leave my friends at home, and I was pretty nervous to start a new life. I feel like everyone is even if they don't admit it. However, I was really excited because from what people told me, I was gonna make all these new friends, go to parties, and find activities that spark my interest in a future career. I expected this all to happen right away.

Well... Kinda.... Sorta...

No

During the first week of college, I remember wondering where my "squad" was. Where were the people that shared a love for cheeseburgers and dogs like my friends at home did? Looking through social media, I saw post after post with groups of college girls going out together. Why didn't I have that? There were people that I would say hi to but, everyone already seemed to have their group. This however isn't actually the case. At all.

The same applies for going to class and joining clubs/ activities. Sitting in on my first lecture, I couldn't help but think, "What am I doing here?" or "This isn't what I want to do with my life," and the most famous of them all: "What do I want to do with my life?" I immediately thought I wouldn't be able to handle the workload, and I just wasn't cut out for this whole college thing.

Even though I've only been a college student for nine weeks, I've learned that everything takes time. As much as you want to believe you are alone, and that no one else is in the same predicament as you, it's not true. In fact most people if not all deal with these same exact feelings. Everyone is still trying to figure themselves out and adapt to a new environment, which is totally okay.

If I could give one piece of advice to anyone with these same feelings, I'd say give it time. You will find friends, you will go to parties, and you will find your passion. It certainly didn't happen right away for me, but I'm on the path to genuinely making this experience "the best four years of my life".


Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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A Day In The Life Of A Girl Who Struggles With Anxiety

Anxiety affects different people in different ways, and does not define who they are.
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Anxiety sucks. You never know when you'll feel it but, when you do, you TRULY feel it. You may not know this, but just because it's bad at one point and some people have extreme cases, it doesn't have to be the same for everyone. Anxiety is a disorder that effects different people in different ways, and does not define who they are. Here's what my daily routine looks like in a nutshell.

I wake up, eat, go to class, do homework...just average stuff. Every day goes on as normal, or as normal as it gets. What you don't see is that I'm constantly questioning myself and overthinking the simplest of actions.

Oftentimes, I struggle to hold a conversation with someone I'm not very familiar with because I'm scared I'll say the wrong thing that'll come back and bite me in the ass, or that the other person is not genuine and that they're gonna go behind my back and say nasty things about me.

Now I know that other people's behavior doesn't have any control over how I live my life, but I'm not going to deny that it hurts me emotionally. In fact, I use that emotional pain as motivation to go out and do my best. The best revenge in life is success. If someone else feels intimidated by how well I'm doing, then I know I'm doing something right.

But to make difficult situations slightly more bearable, I surround myself with close friends and others that I trust will have my best interest in the event something goes awry. Generally though, everything works itself out without calling for desperate measures.

Contrary to popular belief, living with anxiety doesn't mean that a person is constantly living through a panic time. A few times I may experience panic attacks, but they're usually mild and go away in time. My anxiety doesn't interrupt my daily life and doesn't keep me from doing the things I love.

Whenever it starts to, I always remind myself that everything happens for a reason and just because I don't feel well in one moment, doesn't mean that I'm always going to feel that way. It usually subsides rather quickly.

I am not defined by my anxiety, and in fact having anxiety helps me be more aware of my surroundings and to be more considerate of others. Whenever someone else has an issue, I will listen to them and help them calm down. My experience allows me to be more empathetic towards people and to be of assistance to them in ways others cannot. Anxiety attacks are really uncomfortable, but they don't go on endlessly. Like Axl Rose sings, "Nothing lasts forever in the cold November rain".


Cover Image Credit: Wikimedia Commons

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You Pledged To Never Do Drugs But Now Addiction Is In The Air

This generations wave of addicts
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Can I hit that? Is that a juul? Oh my gosh, that's so cool! Can I hit that?

Do you remember the time you pledged to never do drugs in elementary school? Or maybe that time in middle school when they had the D.A.R.E assembly? You swore you would never get involved with drugs because they showed you a lung that was black from smoking cigarettes. You have seen the ads about vaping, how we think that big tobacco companies are not aiming towards kids even though they have flavors like bubblegum, cotton candy and any kind of fruits you can name.

It is often overlooked. We don't really think there is a problem, but there is. Every party is filled with clouds, the smell of sweetness is in the air. The urge to hit someone's juul is crawling around the room. It's no wonder why sickness spreads so fast on college campuses. If you have a juul, vape, or suorin, or whatever device that can blow out smoke -- you know what I mean. And not to mention all the drunk sorority girls who basically beg to get a hit. "Can I hit that?"

The addiction is literally in the air.

I never even knew what a juul or suorin was until college. I knew what vapes were but I thought they were harmless.

These things that are supposed to help people with their nicotine addiction ultimately started a whole new wave of addicts.

It's hard to resist -- I get it. Everyone around you is doing it and you think, "What is the harm in trying it once?" You start learning little tricks, how to french and ghost inhale, how to do O's, and suddenly you find yourself investing in one of these devices.

And it's not cheap. Especially if you're illegally buying it from smoke shops who don't I.D

You begin investing in these devices, constantly hitting it every so often, you don't even realize you're getting addicted. You're even addicted to the motions of putting the device to your mouth.

And of course, it's all fun and games until your nicotine level goes from a 3 to a 50. It is easy to get addicted and it seems completely harmless because there are no studies on what the long-term effects of these have.

This generation's problem is the wave of vaporized smoking devices. If you have not been a part of this wave -- you are in good standing.

If you are a part of the majority who is already addicted, there is hope for you!

It is easier said than done, but think about it. Juul pods cost a crap ton, for what, only 4? You know those go by extremely fast -- especially if you bring that to a party. Vapes itself range from $50-$300, that is if you actually get a nice one. Plus on top of that, you pay $20 for juice that burns your mouth if it leaks.

Imagine how much money you can be saving when you stop feeding your addiction.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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