To my Ex-Best Friend,

You see, “best friends forever” is never something we really said to each other- that seemed a little too middle school for our adult lifestyles.

Instead, we showed our relationship with plenty of “I love you’s,” sisterhood bonding, and even the same bedroom. I ended up coming to the conclusion that the forever part was intended in our messy lives anyway.

I ended up becoming your sister after my eighteenth birthday when I was finally able to break free from an abusive household. Your family basically adopted me and you know what? For once I finally felt okay in life.

I never had to fret when I needed a shoulder to cry on; neither did you. I always had someone to make me laugh; so did you. I was never confronted with a boring moment; neither were you.

You were the sister I never had.

So all in all, there is nothing I can truly say to express myself at this point in our ‘best friends forever’ moment except...ouch.

I won’t go into personal details with anything on a website that I use to just express myself- but I mean, it’s not like you’d care because this is how many long text messages later after opening up my emotions about everything, and I still go back and check our text feed to see if it really does say “Read at 11:23 PM.”

P.S. It does.

From the get go I had always thought that best friend breakups were supposed to be worse than boyfriend breakups, but from what I can assume by how easily you dropped me over something that your boyfriend did and I informed you about, I guess we didn't really have a friendship to break at all. Three years traded for a number of months you can count on one hand.

You see, the term "best friends" comes as a total package; there are so many steps to accomplish.

Step One.) Always tell each other everything. Secrets are no fun if your best friend doesn't know.

Step Two.) You're not best friends until you've seen each others boobs.

Step Three.) Love. Love. Love. Love each other.

Step Four.) Always tell the truth. Even if it hurts. If you don't like something she did- tell her.

Step Five.) Worry about her. Worry for her.

Step Six.) Want her to be the happiest.

And Finally,

Step Seven.) She deserves to know everything you know and everything you find out.

You see I followed those rules, and for that, I am sorry.

I am sorry I attempted to care, and I am sorry it is not what you wanted to hear.

I am sorry that you think I am a liar, and I am sorry that you could turn a blind eye so quickly on me. I truly hope you don't have whiplash.

I guess I am supposed to speak now about how I hope your future is great without me- about how I wish you the best and maybe we can cross paths again, but I guess college can come between the best of us (part of me knew this was inevitable- I hate to say the least). We are on two polar paths in life and it seems like we have done nothing but be pushed further away, and so no. I do not want to ever speak to you again. I hope you can stomach that.

But I guess, yes, I am sorry that I will hurt from this for a while. It will linger in the back of my mind and at the bottom of empty bottles for a while to come, but I will come to terms with it soon enough. You have moved on so quickly because you never even cared enough to hold on in the first place. You know where you are set in life. Eventually I will forget about you as much as you forgot about me, and if that is what your happiness is built on, then so be it.

Love,

Your ex-best friend

P.S. If you want your knife out of my back you can come get it from me any day now, but that's only if you can ever stomach up the balls to even speak to me in the first place.