Formal Sorority Recruitment

Each college has a varying number of sororities from local to national organizations. Each colleges process is also different. In light of the season from formal recruitment, I would like to share with you my experience this past weekend and how I have found my home.

At Montclair State, the National Panhellenic Conference consists for four sororities: Delta Phi Epsilon, Sigma Delta Tau, Sigma Sigma Sigma and Phi Sigma Sigma. Four options and four days of back and forth between sororities, what you want, what you end up with, emotional rollercoasters. My process consisted of five hours days for three days and then finally the three hour bid day as the forth and final day.

On the first day I was able to go around to each sorority with my group and my Pi Rho Chi, who gave up their letters for two months in order to help us newbies find a home, to explore my different options upon joining one of these organizations. Entering each room, we're paired up with a sorority sister, allowing us to ask questions about them, the sorority and pretty much anything that would make or break the sorority. The first day is held like a mixer, switching off sisters and then finally at the end you knock one sorority off your list and prepare to meet three the next day.

On the second day, I was called back to two out of the three sororities of my choosing. I ended up being called back to the one I dropped as well. This day is about Philanthropy. This is the day about what the sororities stand for, support and raise money for. This day people, like me, begin to grow passionate about different organizations. This day I found a sorority that I loved! Their philanthropy spoke to me and I spent most of my time in the room talking about it. In another room, I did not fall in love with the philanthropy, although a good cause, however I fell in love with the girls, making it a little harder. At the end of that day we cut another sorority and move on to the third and final day.

On the third day, I was called back to one of the two sororities of my choosing. The one that I had cut the first and second day however called me back again. The third day is ritual day, it's very special to the sisters as is it what joins them together and bonds them to one another. It also brings the sisters closer to the new sisters to come. On this day, I was already bummed out about not getting into the sorority that I set my heart on. I was so passionate about them and really thought they liked me too that it was very hard to come back the third day and see two sororities without being upset. In the end though I smiled and I laughed with the girls hoping to make a connection one last time. That day we placed our bids to two sororities, in order of which we wanted more.

Finally, came Monday, Bid day. This is the day that girls find out where we would end up. Some people got calls throughout the day saying that they wouldn't be apart of any organization, others like me knew we made it but didn't know which of the two we would be sitting at. With our groups and out Pi Rho Chi, we sat in a circle holding our bids in envelopes in our hands. At the drop of 6:50pm every girl ripped open their envelopes, screaming with happiness about finding there home while others cried over not making it to where they thought they belonged.

I won't lie, I didn't think this was the right place for me. I didn't think this sorority was home to me. I was so sure I belonged in another one. That was up until I ran into the ballroom and looked at my new sisters. They were smiling, sisters that I had met during the days, who wanted me in Tri Sigma were so happy to see that I chose them they way they chose me. After hugging all they girls and embracing each of them as if I had known them forever, my heart changed a bit. I found my home with Tri Sigma. I had gathered so many numbers and took so many pictures. I received a shippy to help me through the initiation process and I met people just like me. Sure, I thought I belonged somewhere else but I was so wrong.

My advice to those of you who are going through the process, are planning to go through the process or just got through it, everything happens for a reason. Each outcome is not to hurt you or to upset you but because it was meant to be that way. Go into this process with an OPEN MIND. Each day even if you keep striking out (just like me) keep going and keeping going into the sorority parties with an open heart because even though others may have dropped you, this one has continued to take you every day. They take you not because they have to but because they WANT YOU. They see you as a sister already. The best thing I heard this weekend from any of the sororities came from my own. During the ritual the recruitment director said, "When deciding to accept you back here this weekend, every sister had to answer the question, "Can you see yourselves loving this women as a sister?" The answer was unanimously yes." These girls pick you because they wan to love you. Give them that chance, open your heart to loving them and you too will find your home the way I did with Tri Sigma!