Am I pretty enough? Am I intelligent enough? Am I talented enough? Am I funny enough? Am I enough?
Questions like these float through my head frequently without me even realizing it. Maybe I’m crazy, but I think a lot of us wonder whether we’re good enough a countless amount of times. Maybe you have wondered if you were smart enough to be in a certain class or a certain major. Or you weren’t sure if you were skilled enough to be involved in your favorite sport or activity. Maybe you’ve even thought you weren’t deserving enough to be someone’s significant other or even friend. These and more are all thoughts we try to fight often. No one wants to wonder if they are actually good enough, but we think about this constantly anyway.
We are continually told that college is the best time of our lives! We will never get moments like these back! And yes, you will have the time of your life but what we’re not told is that these are the hardest times of our lives as well. Some of us go into thinking we know our exact life plan, while others are trying to figure out what exactly that plan is. However no matter how prepared we think we are plans change, life changes, and we change. We constantly compare ourselves to others: celebrities, models and “perfected” people. Instead of focusing on all of the good in ourselves and all of the amazing things we have to offer, we focus on everything we don’t have. We compare ourselves to these perfected images and wonder why we don’t have that flawless smile or a model body. You compare yourself to your peers around you, wondering why you don’t get straight A’s as easily. It’s so easy to tear yourself down, feeling like you’re stupid, plain, and awkward. We compare ourselves to perfected images and what seems like perfected people around us. Although it’s difficult, it’s crucial to focus on the things that really matter, to focus on the good we all have in ourselves.
It’s easy to get knocked down in our first year of college. You fail your first test ever after getting all A’s in high school. You get cut from chapters during sorority recruitment. You don’t always find best friends right away. You feel like you are continually failing, and it’s hard to keep your confidence up with all of this going on. Being away from your hometown friends and family is hard, and you feel like they don’t understand. But so many people are going through the same thing you’re going through, whether you realize it or not. What you don’t realize at the time is, after you failed that first test you end up acing your next one. You got cut from a couple of chapters during recruitment that you thought would be the one for you, but you ended up in the perfect chapter for you. You didn’t find those best friends within the first couple months, but when you do find those friends you realize how worth the wait it was. You may get knocked down over and over again, but everything will turn out for the better. You’re going to learn a lot about yourself, but I hope you remember that you are better than what you’re feeling right now, and it will get better.
If I learned one thing my freshman year of college, it’s that confidence is one of the most important qualities to possess. As cliche as it sounds, you can do anything with confidence. Going into exams, interviews, or even talking to a new person with self-assurance will get you where you want to go. But how do you get there? We’re constantly told to “just be confident!” We all wonder, but never ask how to actually get to that point. I’m no expert, but I’ve learned some things about confidence in the past couple years. It starts with knowing what you’re good at and what you excel at. Focus on your favorite things about yourself. Talk to people about what you’re passionate about. Don’t be scared to hold back because if your friends don’t like you for your passions and who you really are, then they’re not they people you need in your life and that’s not what you deserve.
It truly breaks my heart to hear all of these amazing people tear themselves down because they are so focused on that perfect image. We’re so focused on what people will think of us that we’re not always ourselves. As a sophomore in college, I have definitely not gotten this whole confidence thing down completely. We all have days where we don’t feel like enough. But if there’s one thing I wish everyone could truly believe, it’s that you are enough. You are enough to be whatever you want to be and do whatever you want to do. If we can start putting emphasis on all of the unbelievable things we have to offer, we will find the right paths for us. So, focus on the good in yourself and in others, and with all sincerity believe that you are enough.
