America is in the middle of a huge pandemic, otherwise known as the coronavirus. Shocker, I know. It's not like that's literally all the news is about right now. But anyway, because of this, we're all being quarantined inside and being told to practice social distancing. That means no friends, my boyfriends/girlfriends, no parties, no going out to eat, no anything that involves anyone other than the people that live in your house. AKA: no fun.

And people are all dealing with this in different ways. People have taken up projects they've just never gotten to, like home repair- painting rooms, redoing carpet, fixing that outdoor shed up into a cute little hang out spot! People are getting back into lost hobbies they never had time for before, like painting, reading, cooking, playing music and even embroidering! And some people are even working on bettering themselves, and doing things like working out, eating healthier, and mediating!

And that's all great. But what about the people who maybe aren't doing all these great things?

Personally, I've found myself feeling pretty crappy about myself over the past couple of weeks during quarantine. And while a portion of this crappiness is coming from the fact that our country is literally in the middle of a pandemic, a really big portion of it is coming from the fact that all I see on social media, is everyone now living their absolute best, most productive lives ever now, during quarantine. And it makes me feel bad about myself because, that's just not how I feel.

I've seen so many people throughout this quarantine saying, "Now is the time to do all these things you want to do! You're most likely never going to have another time like this when the country is basically shut down, and you have all this free time! Make the absolute most of it!" And while I do understand that and I definitely have nothing against other people doing this, that's just not how I feel about the situation. Personally, I've never felt so isolated, depressed, and anxious. These are really scary times right now, and I can barely do my homework or watch a tv show without feeling anxious or feeling hopeless that life is going to return back to normal.

And you can call me a "Debbie Downer" or whatever you want, but I don't think we should feel forced to be productive right now. Our country is literally in the middle of a pandemic, and there is a virus going around that is literally killing hundreds and hundreds of people. So forgive me if all I want to do right now is wrap up in a blanket, watch a good Netflix show, eat some junk food, and not think about anything else.

Personally, I've been spending my time doing the most simple of things. I clean my room when it needs done, I do my homework, I watch a lot of Netflix, listen to a lot of music, and scroll through social media for hours. Besides that, there isn't really a lot going on in my life right now. And I'm not saying that's a great thing, but the thing is: it's okay. It's okay to not be feeling 100% at your best, at your most creative, and at your most productive right now. It's okay to be scared of everything that's going on right now, and just wanting to curl up in a ball and not think about it for a while.

So many people's lives have just been flipped completely upside down. I went from being in college, living in an apartment by myself and seeing my best friends every day, to being forced to go back home and live with my parents, take online classes, and never see my best friends anymore. So many people's environments have just changed so incredibly drastically, so to me, the idea of feeling forced to be productive and spending every second of quarantine doing all these things you normally don't get to do, is just crazy, and unrealistic. Everything is just so crazy right now, and I think it's important to not bully ourselves into feeling bad about not being productive, but instead, giving ourselves some time to process everything that's happening, and cope with our new reality, at least for the time being.

Again, I don't think it's a bad thing for people to be productive right now. I actually think it's awesome and I honestly WISH I could be like them right now. I wish I was getting all this great stuff done and being so creative and productive right now, but that's just not the case. And I think that's how a lot of people are feeling right now, and that's okay.