One commonly held belief in modern culture- one that I believed for a very long time- is that in order to be happy in life, you need to have a significant other. That in order to be happy in life, someone else has to love you and give you affection. There is a saying that goes as follows: "Nobody else will ever love you until you learn to love yourself." While loving yourself is an important and healthy practice, it is not always easy to do so, and I can vouch for that. And, to dismantle this well-known saying: even if you don't love yourself, there are so many people that can, and will, still love you. I applaud the promotion of self acceptance and self-love in this tiny little sentence, but absolutely despise the threats it poses to someone who is struggling with their lack of self confidence. Because the truth is, there is someone out there searching for someone exactly like you- whether you love yourself right now, or not. And when the two of you meet, it isn't going to matter where your level of esteem is at. The fact is, you are you. And that is what is important.

For as long as I can remember, I have always struggled with different aspects within myself and have fought battle after battle in my head trying to come to terms with who I am, why I am, and where I am going in my lifetime. Relationships have never come easily to me, and I have yet to find one that has lasted. Is that because at the time of my relationship I didn't love myself? No. It is because none of these people were meant for me. You simply cannot place blame on yourself for the failure of others to love you.

Love is a two-way street and one person cannot be expected to do all of the loving. It took me so long to realize all of this- and it was a very long and painful road. Being confident with yourself does not come as easily to some people as it does to others. It takes a lot of work and practice. And it took me being alone for me to realize that you should not love yourself because someone else wants you to, but because you want to.

Here's the thing (and I can speak from experience): when you love yourself solely because someone else is pushing you to do so, that love is not real. It is fabricated with the intent of pleasing somebody else. But when you really, truly make the conscious decision to love yourself, you will see your entire life transform before you, and that is the most amazing feeling in the entire world. And you will be doing it for yourself, and yourself only.

So, this is me telling you to fall in love with the little things. Loving yourself not only includes loving your physical features and your abilities, it also pertains to the way in which you see the world around you. When you begin to love yourself, you'll start to fall in love with the people around you. You'll fall in love with the conversations you have, the sunrises and the sunsets, the stars, the trees, the sun and the moon. You'll begin to appreciate all of the little things that people do for you. You won't worry anymore about what other people might think of you, or what they might say. And when you reach this point in your life, you will be genuinely happy. The journey to self-love is not an easy one, but when you get there, it is hard to be taken back down.