The quarter here is starting to wrap up and as a second-year college student, I thought I saw everything coming. I'm familiar with Chicago, I'm familiar with the quarter system, I'm familiar with the people here, I'm familiar with the system, so it's natural that I would know what's going to be happening right? I thought it would be a boring, mundane quarter.

But turns out, I was wrong.

I'm going to be honest; the first few weeks back at school were really rough. I felt strong emotions that I've never felt in that capacity. I grew up in a family that was really close and I was taught to never compare oneself to others, so I never felt strong negative emotions like loneliness or sadness for long amounts of time really ever. But now, I have.

It started with being busy I think. The quarter started right off the bat: no breather, no introduction, nothing. Last year all the professors would tell us, "You guys are freshmen. Don't worry about it." Now I can't use that excuse and frankly, no one is using it for me either. That abrupt start was where the loneliness was launched into an extremely long trajectory of several very long weeks. I got so busy with school and work that I lost time to meet up with friends and take time to slow down. I managed to fit in some hangouts, but it was amidst all the emotional chaos that I was in, I feel like I didn't take the time to actually savor that time with them, which isn't fair for them and for me either.

It was a mundane and tedious routine revolving around school, study, go to class, do homework, do more studying, go back to the apartment, and go to sleep to go; through the cycle all over again. Every week I was telling myself, "Get through this week and it'll get better." That went on for a good month and a half. I was closing in on myself.

But somehow, my subconsciousness was looking out for me. I made meetings with different advisors, old professors, bosses and career counselors at least once a week, if not twice a week to talk about my future (as I've written before, I want to become a photographer, so I'm bracing myself with all the advice and networking I can do). Besides having to talk about post-graduation things, I didn't really think much of it. And of course, I didn't outwardly speak to the fact that I wasn't feeling the best, but somehow the topic would always come up about feelings and what seems best for me to me. Exploring your feelings, even if it's simply feelings you have about the future and not your present feelings with someone on the outside with their own experiences and advice, is really liberating. And slowly, but surely, I felt better.

And I learned the valuable lesson of not wallowing up your feelings inside. Sure, I was lucky to have met with all of these people who are willing to listen to me, but I really think trying to do this and being open to talk about anything with someone else will make you feel a hundred times better.

If they aren't listening, find another person to talk to and that person can be anyone: your professor, your friend, an acquaintance, your family, your co-workers: the list goes on. As long as you're willing to share your story, they will (for the most part) be willing to listen. I still find it hard not wallow up my feelings after this experience, but I'm working at getting better. Because, if you forget to take care of yourself, there are consequences.

So, don't let those feeling eat you up from inside. Talk it out. And take care of yourself.