Listen up.
Don’t let anyone define you.
You be you.
Do what you once believed to be the unthinkable.
Be the person you were told you could never be.
Prove the people who didn’t believe in you wrong.
That boy doesn’t look at you?
Give him a reason to notice you, but don’t you dare to ever look back.
Don’t ever let a man define you.
Be considerate to your passions. Pursue them.
Show love for the people who care about you. You’re lucky they’re there.
Learn to avoid the superficial.
Feel like dressing up? Do it.
Feel like buying that expensive makeup palette? Buy it.
Look good for yourself and for no one else.
Be proud of your accomplishments.
Learn to live life to the fullest.
Differentiate the good people from the bad.
Walk through the fire unscathed.
Discover your identity.
Understand your soul.
I once read somewhere that “Self confidence is something which separates the ordinary from the extraordinary. You may have the potential of an Everest climber, but you cannot move a stone without self-confidence.” Confidence isn’t something that is supposed to vary from situation to situation. It shouldn’t be that today you are extremely confident in who you are and tomorrow you’re insecure so your confidence level drops. If your confidence depletes, insecurity won’t take too long to hop on the bandwagon. Today’s society is so concerned about perfection; don’t you think? But to me, it’s our flaws that make us unique and show who we really are as individuals. It’s how we carry ourselves after we’ve identified our flaws that brings forward our confidence. Society has so many expectations of you. But this is the 21st century; you need not conform to their ideas. Be you. But remember, you can’t be perfect, and you most definitely can’t make everyone happy. But you need to make yourself happy. So please realize that.
I spent a lot of time growing up feeling that I had to be perfect: I had to be the perfect child in the family, I had to be the perfect student, I had to the perfect everything. Otherwise … well, I was just another disappointment. But I guess that’s how Indian societies are. Indian females find it so difficult to escape the pressures of upholding perfect reputations. You can’t really do anything on your own without feeling like you would be judged or seem uncultured.
Putting up a front and pretending to be someone leaves you searching for who you really are. You’re so afraid of society tearing you up that you resist the idea of sharing your needs and wants. When your ideas and society’s ideas don’t match up, you’re suddenly wrong.
But I soon began to realize this was nothing that my parents wanted of me. They didn’t care that I wasn’t perfect. They didn’t care that I don’t fit the idea of a perfect Indian girl; they even taught me that this isn’t something I should be ashamed of. I need to accept myself for who I am and walk with confidence. My parents didn’t want me to conform to Indian society’s thinking. They don’t want me to get married as soon as I become of age; in fact, they don’t want me to even settle down until I’ve reached a successful level in my professional life. They certainly don’t want me to maintain the idea that I must remain dependent on a man my whole life.
So I thank them. I thank them for teaching me that it’s OK for me to accept that I’m not perfect. Actually, I know I’m far from perfection, but that’s who I am. I thank them for teaching me how to walk with confidence and how to rid myself of insecurity. Happiness comes from living life the way you want to; happiness comes from breaking free from society’s norms and following your own dreams and aspirations. Nowadays, I don’t even think about being perfect; I really just think about being the best at who I am, because being perfect is so overvalued.
