Dear Inner Self,
There was a time when my inner self ran free. She was free so she climbed trees, bruised her knees, played all kinds of sports with the boys; she had not a care in the world. She believed in her dreams more than her reality. To her, imagination was a safer place to be.
What I didn't notice then that I am aware of now is that she, in her freedom, was lost. She was subconsciously looking for where to fit in, where to belong. She had loving parents and was close with her siblings, but there was still something missing.
In search of what was missing, inner self, I see that you got hurt. You were broken, and you took it upon yourself to heal. You hid behind your exterior because she fed into what others thought was cool. When it seemed to be working, she became your crutch. Inner self, you became weak, and she began to overpower you. She became your voice, your thought; she even began to interfere with your dreams. In your weakness, I saw a light beside you. What was that light? I noticed that whenever you were down, it comforted you. Whenever you were lost, it gave you clarity and direction. It gave you strength that you could not understand.
I remember you feeling unworthy of that light, but it never faded away.
Your exterior began to weaken. She began to grow tired. When you gave the light permission to have control, your exterior began to break apart. The light started piercing through her skin. It hurt. I remember the pain. With every painful experience, you gained strength inner self.
You began to dream again, you began to laugh again, you saw yourself the way this light loves you. I am not perfect, of this I am soo aware, but because of the light of God in me, I will not give up on who I am created to be.
It's in my imperfection that Christ found us. He doesn't require for us to be perfect for him to love us and provide for us. Its the misconception that the world feeds us so that no one feels qualified, but the groundbreaking truth is that regardless of our past, we are called qualified by the Lord Himself.
Love,
Chelbe Tebbs
