Anxiety is one of those things that tends to be underestimated, something that affects so many people and yet hardly ever gets talked about. It can manifest itself in many different ways, always specific to the person that it's affecting. In my experience, everything is connected to other people. Social situations with new people that I have never been around make me feel like I can't breathe, and like ice water has been injected into my veins. It's terrifying and can become horribly isolating.
In all reality, though, according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), anxiety is the most common mental illness in the US. "Feeling anxious" isn't just a passing stage and it's not all the same. I have something called social anxiety. Sounds made up, but it's just one of numerous things that fit under the umbrella of anxiety.
Don't allow yourself to wallow alone. It can be so easy to stay in your dorm and avoid everything, don't be the one that let college life pass them by. It's OK to be scared, just don't put yourself or allow your friend to put themselves through having to go it alone. The fear is isolating in itself and having you push yourself through can be beneficial in showing them that those feelings of loneliness are all self-constructed and unrealistic. Surround yourself with people who love and support you and understand that it is a part of who you are, but also not the defining factor in who you are.
Saying this, relationships are hard. Be it romantic, familial, or a friendship, there are some hard personal things to deal with if you feel that you may be a weight bringing the ones around you down. The thing to remember is that they love you and you love them, and due to this you will work to find a mutual understanding in most situations that life can present. You are not a bother to the people around you.
The voice in your head is wrong.
Just because someone looked at you for a half second and then goes about their business, doesn't mean they have automatically decided to hate you. And if someone does for some reason dislike you, it in no way means that everyone else is going to feel the same way.
If someone looks too long at you and doesn't compliment how you look, your self-confidence doesn't have to shatter. Getting up to go to the bathroom in class does not automatically mean that everyone is going to watch every step you take and judge you. You are not bringing down everyone in your group project, and your input is just as valid and needed as everyone else's.
You are not going to die alone.
It's hard to find that calm within yourself and to be told to do so like it's easy is the absolute worst. For some things like deep breathing or yoga may do the trick, but for others, measures like medication and counseling may need to be taken. It's not an easy process to reach equilibrium and getting help is a necessary thing and is nothing to be ashamed of.
But think about this. Writing an article about anxiety and the possibility of not doing such a big thing justice is a huge fear of my own. I just got through it and the world didn't implode. The things that seem like they will dictate our future really won't and there will always be a fresh new day to come.
