Most people in the world are normal in the sense that they go about their days without being overly concerned about every event that they cannot control. While they eat their meals or go to work, there aren't any nagging thoughts about the possibilities of an earthquake at that moment or if their mom has gotten into a car accident on her way to the grocery store. Sure, they can become worried from time to time, maybe about a specific event such as a job interview, but rarely is it a constant habit. Unfortunately, there are people out there, including myself, who are perpetual worriers, and to be honest, it sucks. So, let me take you on a journey through a day in the life of a perpetual worrier.
Morning tends to be the most worry-free part of the day, possibly because you just woke up and your brain is not fully awake yet. You try to appreciate this joyful ignorant bliss before your brain starts producing the agenda of items that you can worry about today. What may be one of the worst aspects of being a perpetual worrier is that you know that you are going to needlessly worry about multiple people, places and things, yet there is nothing that you can do to stop it.
As the day goes on, your worrying tends to ebb and flow. If you are preoccupied, you likely won't be worrying, but the instant that your brain has a free moment, bam! Suddenly, all you can think about is if something harmful has happened to your relative. Maybe that is a little extreme, but your worrying can range from people judging something you did years ago to a shooting.
The kicker about being a perpetual worrier, though, is that you know that you are worrying too much. You tell yourself over and over again that you are either worrying an unnecessary amount or that you are worrying about things you have no hope of controlling. What is the point in worrying about if an earthquake is going to hit in that possible moment or in the future? Your brain is in a constant tug-of-war between obsessively worrying and being rational, and it is exhausting.
By the end of the day, your mind has hopefully completed its cycle of fretting and fussing. You climb into bed and wait for peaceful sleep to overtake you. But first, let's make sure we go over the possibility of a meteor striking the earth while we sleep, thus preventing the onset of sleep.
Let me be clear, though, there is a distinct difference between perpetual worrying and chronic anxiety. Anxiety disorder does include worrying about events one cannot control, but it evolves into so much more, including physical symptoms and hopelessness about making it through the day. If your worrying develops into anxiety disorder, there are many people out there who can offer support and help.
For everyone out there who is a constant worrier, who would like some peace of mind, here is a saying from Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk, that I often use to calm myself when my worrying is overwhelming: "Breathing in, I calm my body. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment, I know this is a wonderful moment."
