For any gentlemen living the single life, scoring a date is the ultimate achievement. With every outing that you go on with your significant other, she continues to get closer and closer to being "the one." However, what if your favorite basketball analyst and commentator showed up one night? Could things continue to go the way they are?
If my favorite sportscaster commentated my night out, I'm sure it would go a little something like this:
As every gentleman should with his lady, I put in the extra effort to get ready for this night. I got a fresh cut, shaved, and yes, even showered. To top it all off, I dabbed on a little extra great smelling cologne, because I hear it really helps seal the deal when attracting the ladies. I then proceeded to pick up my date and take her to the best high-class restaurant in the city. As soon as we walk in, I hear an ever so recognizable voice come from a speaker in the ceiling,
"It's X's and O's tonight," he spouted. "It's all about strategy and whether or not this man can get the job done! Can he get the big 'W'? Can he get a victory tonight?"
Insert complete and total embarrassment. If this was any preview of how the night was going to go, I was in for a sure ride. Nevertheless, we proceeded to the table that had been reserved for us, attempting to ignore what I wished was a mirage of a sportscaster calling me out in the restaurant.
As we sat down, I was hoping that he would be able to quiet down and allow us to have our dinner in peace. I was wrong. Before my date and I were able to even think about engaging in some serious conversation, he piped up again.
"He's a diaper dandy ladies and gentlemen. He's a young gun. A little guy!"
Trying to avoid the fact the my date was older than I was, I attempted to grab her attention and speak louder, overpowering him. He kept going.
"I don't know if this guy will be able to get the job done. It's going to take a lot! This lady is a superstar!"
Thanks for the support man.
As we waited for our food the next twenty minutes, he continued to commentate on what was going on.
"He really needs to get his game back on track, she's wanting some real Q.T. with a surf and turfer!"
Thankfully, it did quiet down for awhile once the food came and we were able to enjoy some of our dinner in peace. We were able to talk with each other, laugh together and enjoy the peaceful night that was intended. That is, until the waitress came and brought the check.
"I wonder when he's going to pass the rock," he piped up. "Not the basketball! No, no, no! The rock! The ring!"
Of course along with my face becoming red, my date started to blush of embarrassment. Now the whole restaurant seemed to be staring at us now, which was peculiar as this would be the first time they noticed us or the big voice that was a wildly enthusiastic sportscaster calling my date.
In embarrassment, my date quickly got up and began to leave. That is, until she moved passed me. For the first time that night, she had noticed the sweet smelling scent of my cologne. In the blink of an eye, she turned around and sat back down, staring with a gaze at the man that I was. I had a second shot.
"He's a prime-time player," he said coming across the speakers again. "He's a PTP. This kid is going to go far! Thank goodness for that cologne! That play really helped seal the deal here, this is getting to be a real knee-knocker!"
Okay, sure... that might've been a little far fetched. I'm sure if my favorite sportscaster were to commentate my night out, it would prove to be one interesting night no doubt. Not only would you be trying to make the right moves to impress your date, but you would also do so to make sure he wasn't calling you out like he would his college rivalry.
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