Crushing On Your Best Friend Sucks But I Figured Out What To Do

Crushing On Your Best Friend Sucks But I Figured Out What To Do

You don't want to ruin the friendship, but it's so hard to keep your feelings at bay.

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Best friends. These are the people that we rely on when we fall. We go to them for advice when we have no one else. They are the ones we go to gossip about who we have a crush on and the like.

However, who do we go to when that best friend is who we have the crush on? Thus, comes the problem when you are crushing on your best friend.

Unfortunately, I have experience in this category and let me just say it sucks. When your free time is spent with this person and you harbor these feelings it's hard to keep them under wraps. When all you want to do is scream these feelings from the rooftops, but you can't because it might alter your friendship.

I'm glad to say I'm no longer stuck in this particular situation and am happily in love with my boyfriend who turns out to be one of my best friends, but that doesn't mean I can't offer some advice. In my sophomore year of high school, a guy that I hadn't seen since elementary school transferred into my classes. I was good friends with this boy, but it had been so long.

Turns out, we fell right into being best friends again and were happy goofing off in the middle of class. However, as much fun as we used to have, the fun would end when he would bring up his girlfriend of the month. It made it hard for me to not be jealous and not act as such. I just had to smile and play along and bury my feelings. After all, I couldn't openly admit my feelings when he was talking about his girlfriends.

Also, being such good friends, I worried what admitting these feelings would do to our friendship. It was easier for me to not know what he felt because then I could always think maybe he feels the same way. The land of denial was an unhealthy place to be but felt safer than ruining everything. So, I went on to play the best friend role and was the definition of being friend zoned.

I was in this situation for almost a year when I slipped up and was forced to reveal my feelings. He was talking about how he was going out with some girl and I guess I let some animosity slip out and he questioned me. I then revealed my feelings in a long awkward text and he replied with what I was most afraid of. He told me that he didn't feel that way but wanted to continue being friends.

Well, as most know when the opposite sex says "let's still be friends" it really never stays that way. As much as I wanted to continue our friendship. Summer vacation came along, and we talked less and less until we stopped completely, and I didn't even get a "hi" in the halls when we returned to school.

This experience taught me a lot and I would like to share so some poor girl doesn't experience the hurt I did at the end of this situation.

The advice I have to offer here is when you notice these feelings say something right away. If you let them bottle up it will only make things worse, I promise.

Also, don't say it in a text. That lacks all emotion and doesn't really get your point across. Make it a face to face conversation, that way your feelings get across the way you want them to.

Lastly, if you are afraid of wrecking your friendship — like I was — don't be. If your friendship is truly strong and important enough it will be fine after this regardless of any feeling shared or not shared.

The biggest take away from this is to never hide your feelings. I wish I never had because I lost a good friend in the end. Now, like I said before I am very happy in my relationship now, but I can't help but think what would have happened if I had done things differently. Don't give yourself those reasons to regret. Just live your life happily. That is the goal.
Cover Image Credit:

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To My Boyfriend's Mom

He loves you more than you could ever imagine...
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Without you, there would not be a him, so first things first, thank you.

1. Thank you for teaching him to love a woman the right way, to put God first, and YOU before me always, the respect he shows you is so attractive, and you deserve it.

He talks about you like you hung the moon, I don't doubt for a second that he will be an amazing father one day, I owe all of that to you.

2. Thank you for giving me a chance, learning to love me when you knew your son was doing the same.

I can't speak for my own first impressions, but hopefully mine was not THAT bad...when we both slapped him on the arms for his rude remark at the same time, I knew our relationship was already blossoming.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

3. Thank you for every meal you have ever purchased me.

And chocolate, and candy...you know just as well as your son does that food is the way to my heart. Especially Taco Bell and cheesecake ;)

4. Thank you for your advice, suggestions, and opinions...and asking for mine

Whether it's telling me to slap him for being a smart a$$, or you're asking me about color swabs for your kitchen makeover, you come to me as if I am your own, and I am so honored to give you my own input.

5. Thank you for including me

You never fail to leave a spot for me, and I love family dinners/outings with you guys just as much as I love my own!

6. Thank you for teaching your son to never give up, and that if he does it is only to better himself, or it's the only choice he has left.

He is so focused on his future, he wants the best for himself, and he is constantly reminding me that these are things that YOU taught him, you deserve to be so proud.

7. Thank you for letting him love my family, and allowing me to love yours.

He is so loyal and loving to my family, and I don't even have to ask myself why because I see him with you and yours. Thank you for letting us double up on holidays when we can, and making sure we get the most out of our time with you!

8. Thank you for being his best friend.

I think of him as mine too, but I couldn't think of a better person to also hold that title, you know him better than anyone else and you always will.

9. Thank you for teaching him how to treat a woman

He is constantly telling me "You sound like my mother." Thankfully earlier in our relationship, he told me that the woman he wants to be with, should do just that. He always tells people who try, "No, no one calls me by my full name except my mom and my girlfriend."

10. Thank you for your honesty

We all know that he and I can drive you crazy sometimes, thank you for telling us like it is, and making sure we know you still love us anyways.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

11. Thank you for teaching him to work as hard as possible in anything and everything he does.

I have never met anyone with such a desire for success, he and I are constantly discussing how we can better our futures, and I know exactly where his drive comes from.

12. Thank you for teaching him to clean up after himself

Even though sometimes, it takes him a minute to do so.

13. Thank you for teaching him how to love, and letting him love me.

I have never felt so loved by a man, probably because anyone else who came into my life was just a boy. Thank you for your unconditional love for him, he is your entire heart and that is so easy to see, I am happy to share his with you.

You and I both know that even years from now we will both occasionally probably be closing the fridge that he left open, cleaning the crumbs he dropped, demanding he take a shower after playing soccer, or reminding him 20 times about plans we made weeks ago, we both share such a great love for such an amazing man. I could never be more thankful that you brought forth into this world such a comforting, supportive, protective, steadfast, driven, handsome, and hilarious guy. Thank you for everything you do for him, for me, and for us, I love you a lot!

Cover Image Credit: casey

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Snapchat Has Become The Newest Dating App Of Our Generation

"Can I get your snap?"

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In this day in age, everyone has the app Snapchat and if you don't, you might be missing out on the biggest dating opportunity of our time. The app Snapchat was originally used to send ten-second photos of yourself to your chosen friends but in recent years it has grown to become a source of communication for dating. People would rather hand out their Snapchat usernames rather than their real phone number.

Snapchat was originally used to do brief communication with your closest friends. You can only send quick pictures of yourself or whatever is around you and only put very few words on a picture. Does that sound like a quality conversation to you? That's because it isn't. Dating has become more and more online in the past few years which has caused this growth in Snapchat being used for this sole purpose. People can easily put this picture perfect life on Snapchat and only capture their best selves. You don't even have bios on Snapchat so the person knows less about you than on any other dating app, only what you choose to share in those ten-second photos.

The use of Snapchat in dating has changed dating altogether. It has caused it to become less conversational and more about a game. Once giving or receiving a person's Snapchat, people always feel like the other person should always respond first because it shows that they care but if they don't it shows that they are not interested. Even when they do send a Snapchat, it's always about the waiting game. If you respond too quickly, then you look desperate but wait too long then it looks like you're not interested. People also give out Snapchats rather than phone numbers because of its lack of ties. If you give someone your Snap it means they might be interested but only give the phone number if you know them really well and want to potentially date them. It is always about the game when it comes to Snapchat dating and if you play the game wrong, then you end up getting ghosted.

With this new online dating world, people are able to ghost a person easier than in real life. Ghosting is when you are talking to someone and out of the blue, they drop all communication with you and never speak to you again. Sorry ladies if you got ghosted recently but it actually happens more often then some would think due to online dating. People are easily able to un-add people on social media and ignore their messages.

While Snapchat is a great app to communicate with friends, the use of it as a source of dating and getting to know someone is questionable. People use it to try and get to know people which it lacks because of its limited ways to communicate. So the next time someone asks you, "Can I get your Snap," just know the purpose behind it is not what you may think.

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