Inadequacy isn’t a common adjective we use to describe how we feel- but I’m more than sure that over half of us have had this feeling at least some point in our lives.
I don’t think we feel inadequate because we feel worthless. Sometimes you wake up and nothing may be necessarily wrong, simply out of place. I think we punish ourselves with a feeling of inadequacy because we tend to measure our personal successes and failures against that of others. We see people around us doing all these great things- they’re taking cool artsy pictures, they’re going to different countries and exploring the world, maybe they have straight A’s, enrolled in Medical School, have the nicest cars and the best-paying jobs, and you look at yourself in the mirror and say, “Wow. What am I doing with my life?”
Sometimes inadequacy creeps up on us and other times it just slaps us right in the face- such as when you realize you still haven’t achieved a goal you set out to reach over a year ago (in my case, losing an extra ten pounds before every summer but it seems to never happen). I often feel inadequate because I want to be accomplishing so much more- but something always seems to hold me back.
If you’ve ever been excited over the idea of starting a new project, picking up a new hobby, but then suddenly lost the confidence to do so, then you and I are in the same boat.
Sometimes we tell ourselves we want to do something, but don’t give ourselves enough confidence to succeed in our endeavor, and then ultimately we give up. Then later down the road, we have this odd feeling of inadequacy as we see others doing the things we wish we were doing.
Social media can be a good or bad contributing factor to how we may feel about ourselves. Maybe seeing someone do something will push you harder to achieve the same goal- or maybe it’ll just shred your confidence to bits and you’ll lose the motivation you thought you had.
No matter what, though, there will always be something you can do to solve it.
The next time you find yourself seeking the approval of other’s for your own personal well-being, or are suffering from feelings of inadequacy - find your confidence.
Confidence in yourself is the key to making sure you achieve what you really want. The next time you start to feel inadequate- you may not even know what the reason may be. Be confident and stay motivated that you can accomplish whatever goals you set to achieve.
Do not gauge your success and happiness against that of others. You set your own bar and you define the parameters of success. Don’t let the façade of social media be the scale that defines your successes, who you are or who strive to be. The important thing is to take the first step. Take solace with the infamous words of the philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche who stated, “he who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying.”
If you’ve been wanting to go back to school (but feel it’s too late)-- just do it. Whether it’s learning to speak Spanish, play the piano, or fitting back into your size two jeans from high school- it’s never too late, the longer you put off achieving your goals the greater the feeling of inadequacy. Confidence and inadequacy go hand in hand- everything in life has a yin and yang aspect to it. Remember to give yourself the confidence to overcome any obstacles you may meet along the way. The feeling of inadequacy may be Mother Nature’s way of reminding us not to settle, to go out and accomplish, and to do what our hearts desire.
