So I work at a competition dance studio in Easley, South Carolina. A few months ago, we had our summer intensive where we invite master teachers and choreographers to come in and work with our students. One of the choreographers that came was a woman by the name of Cat Vigor. Cat was a FIERCE choreographer out of Atlanta who was absolutely amazing. She was a great choreographer, teacher and dancer. I mean she could do it all. So during lunch, I wanted to pick her brain and see how she does what she does. She was casually speaking with her assistant and they were talking about a project she did some years back. Me being the nosey person I am, I asked what project did she work on. And this girl said.."Oh, I was in the "Run the World" video with Beyonce.
WHAT.
I'M SORRY. WHO?
BEYONCE GIRL.
BYE.
CHECK PLEASE.
I'M DONE.
My mouth dropped to the floor and I said "BEYONCE? You just casually said it like went to the store, bought some Cheetos, danced back up for Beyonce." I was sick. But immediately I thought to myself "Yo I'm almost 24...I haven't danced for anyone. I live in an area with no dance scene for adults. At 24, she had Beyonce in resume. I had teacher and former beauty queen. Wtf am I doing with my life?" I was a dance teacher who taught but didn't get to dance like she did.
So I sulked. And what do we do when we sulk? We get on social media and sulk some more. So, of course, I log on to Instagram and I see a friend from college that just got this big fancy job in New York City. Then two weeks later, I found out that two girls I know got to dance for Beyonce at the VMAs. And I was like REALLY?!?! All of these people are living this fabulous life and I feel stuck. I felt like I'm not as fabulous like all of my other friends and I wanted to know why I couldn't have that too. Why couldn't I live in a big city with a job that allowed me to travel the world and sip cocktails and rub elbows with high executives?! I WANTED IT TOO. But then I realized that I had the mindset of a kid that wants a new toy. Usually, kids only want a new toy or gadget when they see someone else that has it. I was so fascinated with Cat's life but I was completely okay with mine before she said anything about dancing for Beyonce. I was jealous of her.
I was jealous at the fact she was dancing and doing something that I would love to do. I had forgotten all the aspects of my life that God has blessed. I forgot about how He blessed me with not only one full-time job but a part-time job too, a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food on the table, etc. All because I heard this girl say something I wanted. I became greedy. I wanted more than what I was already getting (knowing good and well I didn't deserve it).
Now there's nothing wrong with being ambitious. I try to surround myself with people that are successful because that will help push me to my fullest potential. But there is something wrong with looking at someone's life and being envious or jealous of what they have. We're human. We all do it. We look at social media and see people with beautiful relationships, that are gorgeous and have money and have a good job and the perfect little family and you're just like "does anything really go wrong with them?" And the answer is yes. See, the funny thing about social media is that it is filtered (Ha, get it??). It only gives us a glimpse of what that person's life is actually like. We don't see the negative bank account balances or the tears they cry or hear the arguments they have. We see what they want us to see. When Cat told me about dancing for Beyonce, that's all I saw. I wanted her life because of that one aspect and I became ungrateful for God's blessings.
Moral of the story is don't compare your success to someone else's. But use that to motivate you to achieve the goals and purposes that God has for you. There's a song my Aunt Helen sings sometimes and the chorus says "What God has for me it is for me. I know without a doubt that He will bring me out. What God has for me it is for me." As a child of God, His plan is my plan. I have no idea what God has in store for me in the next few years. But I do know whether it is teaching my babies in Anderson or dancing back-up for Beyonce, God's plan is always going to be better than mine. My success for me.
Stay grateful. Stay thankful.
Peace and all of the blessings,
Lustra<3
