Let me clarify this article by saying that, no, I don't think we should all stop wearing bras tomorrow or get offended when someone opens the door for us. But I've been thinking about writing this for a long time (since the beginning of last semester, in fact) and I think there's a lot of things to say. Hear me out, ladies and gentlemen. And yes, boys, I'm talking to you, too.
Those of you who do not consider yourselves feminists, let me begin by asking "and why the hell are you not?" Beyond the shallow, culturally accepted humor that people find in jokes about women belonging in the kitchen or being inferior to men, most of us rationally-minded people can agree that the sexes are equal in intellect, in manipulative skills, in culinary arts, in the ability to break hearts, in musical prowess, in comedic genius. For every great woman in those fields, I can list an equally incredible man.
You can scoff at me if you want, or laugh, or tell me to stop taking myself so seriously, but boys, the days of sexist jokes are coming to a close; I hate to break it to you. But most of the men I know (worth knowing) want a strong woman anyway. And women who think it makes them a "bro" for bashing feminism, I want you to know that I am violently rolling my eyes at you and also that you should thank a feminist for the progress that has made it socially acceptable for you to speak without being spoken to first.
To narrow it down, here's a list of things feminism is not:
1. Hating men.
2. Hating traditional values.
3. Hating women that prioritize traditional values or images of what a woman should be.
4. Being a bitch.
Here is what feminism is: Believing in equality of the sexes.
As a nineteen-year-old woman, I am seldom taken seriously. I am laughed at when the question, “What do you want to do after college?” is answered with, “neuroscience,” accused of coming to college to find a husband, and lose credibility as a member of a sorority. Men can be anything they desire – whether they are short or tall, blessed with intelligence or the IQ of a doorknob, born into money or saluted as the underdog making his own fortune. Even in the twenty-first century, it is expected that finding a boyfriend or husband is my number one priority, that I am unintelligent because I am blonde and young, and that I am to smile at even those people I dislike because I am perfectly pleasant.
These unwritten rules ripple through the air every time I tell a boy who wolf whistles at my friends that he can keep his hands to himself, every time I make a better grade than the pompous jerk who sits next to me in calculus, every time I don’t feel the need to laugh insincerely at a joke told at a party. This, in my opinion, is repression in its modern form: that women are expected to be satisfied with their unequal share of credibility, choices, and safety. And not only that they should be satisfied, but that they are taught from a young age that this is the way it should be. Mothers perhaps no longer expect their daughters to iron khakis perfectly or know four different table settings, but society still expects physical perfection and happiness with the condition of women’s rights.
Out of years of women stifled has grown a tree of bitterness that the media portrays today as radical feminism. In reality, the protestors in Ottawa laying red dresses on the steps of the capitol in memory of murdered and missing women are simply refusing to anymore “turn [their] backs…be silent about the violence,” the women marching in the “Slutwalk” were protesting the common advice that they shouldn’t dress immodestly if they wanted to keep from being assaulted as opposed to people being taught not to assault, and the women with “No one will enslave me” emblazoned on their bodies at a Muslim convention were overturning the belief that they were property of men.
When viewed through the cultural microscope of perfection, women always fall short. Instead of being validated internally by their successes and talents, women view their achievements from the outside: beautiful, as defined by Cosmopolitan; successful, compared to the male CEO’s at the top of the corporate world; funny, in a way that isn’t crude; intelligent, but not in a way that competes with men; athletic, but never able to beat a man in a race. Feminists are ridiculed for their “intense” conviction that women should be equal to men. The nineteenth amendment to the Constitution, while still a milestone for women in America, granted rights to women across the country, as if they were something that could be given by a man and not something that all humans were born deserving.
That sounds harsh, I know. But the thing is, it's all true. So, yeah, that's part of the reason I think every college student should be a feminist. But also consider this: as mostly twenty-somethings about to be launched into the "real" world, we are perfectly positioned to be doers, to be changers, to be catalysts for the generation to come. College aged people are the people who begin revolutions, who can vote, who speak out, who inspire younger people. We are the voice of the world right now. We can make the change: to stop cat-calling and assault, to protect and empower our friends, to remind women that life is not a race to meet standards of beauty and perfection.
If our demographic can shape the next generation of women to be strong, and smart, and confident, that will mean only good things for all of us. If it means less eating disorders and more master chefs, less beaten-down girls scared to speak and more comedians, less sexual assault victims and more strong political leaders, less women hiding their intelligence and more doctors; a wider variety of women in acting and modeling and business and law; a world where all our sisters and daughters feel safe; less tension and more friendship and happier marriages - doesn't a change towards feminism just sound right?
