All of us know that one guy or girl who is the “innocent” one, the “sheltered” kid, or the “Moms and Dads” of the friend group. Anyone that knows me is not surprised to know I am the dad of my friends. Many people make this guy or girl out to be the fun killer, but believe me, we don’t take on this role on purpose. Here’s a few things you probably didn’t know or have forgotten about your college-aged “Mom and Dad”:
Mom and Dad are ALWAYS watching
No matter how stupid you get, we’ll make sure you are okay. I can’t tell you how many times “Mom and Dad” have pulled 
you out of a potentially dangerous situation, where you were too drunk to remember anything. Whether it was that last shot of Fireball you wanted to take, the set of stairs you wanted to dive off of, or the irresponsible sex act you wanted to commit, we were there to make sure you didn’t injure yourself, physically, financially, and emotionally. We are going to let you know just how dumb you were in the morning, but for the night, we make sure you have your fun without serious injury or emotional damage. We like to think of ourselves as the guardian angels of your reputation, but no need to thank us.
Mom and Dad never have a night off
Regardless of how many times you try to convince us that it’s our night off from “babysitting,” we are often too mistrusting to let someone else take on the role of “Mom and Dad.” For us, letting loose might be one drink. We cannot bring ourselves to get where we’ve seen you because we are afraid to trust someone else to be our “Mom and Dad.” Even when we’re supposed to be having fun, we don’t stop looking out because we’ve been used to doing it for so long.
Mom and Dad would like to enjoy the party too
Our friends are okay with letting us take on our roles mainly because they assume we don’t really want to party and we’re more antisocial than the rest of the crowd. Sorry to disappoint, but we’d like to enjoy the party, too. 
Unlike you, we can have fun at a party without getting totally hammered, but taking care of you will take precedence. We’re okay leaving early because we don’t want you to have to pay the hosts for puking all over the carpet. Sure, we were hitting it off with other “Moms and Dads” at the party, but we also get a little tired because of the lack of alcohol in our systems, so don’t worry about it.
Mom and Dad will lecture you, but never judge you
We know about your roughest nights, but we also know you sober, so we never judge. After all of the booze wears off after a rough night, we’re going to let you know just how much of a fool you were, but we’re going to laugh about it, too. Trust me, it was funny for us, but it also scared us to death. Was it a good idea for you to try to go golfing off of the third story of the house? Probably not, but you didn’t break anything and it was really funny when you thought you got a par for the course. We got you back into your room, where you could sleep everything off, but in the morning, you can bet we’re going to chat with you about pacing yourself with liquor and trying to sleep with strangers.
Why do we volunteer to be Mom and Dad?
The short answer is, we don’t. We become “Mom and Dad” out of necessity. We are wired to take care of people and since we are a little shyer at parties than you, it’s our excuse not to do anything. We live vicariously
through you. But, we also do it because we love you for who you are; we would hate to see anything happen to you and we only want the best. We take care of you because you sure as hell aren’t going to do it and sometimes we get a little satisfaction out of it, too.
What can you do for Mom and Dad?
We don’t ever expect anything in return from you, but every once in a while, a simple “Thank you for watching out for me” would do. If you’re feeling really generous, make a special effort to show “Mom and Dad” how you can take on the role too. Maybe you will switch with us sometime, but you’ve got to show us you can handle the responsibility. You can’t get intoxicated, you’ve got to make sure we don’t break things and hurt ourselves, and more than anything, you’ve got to make sure we don’t take the various “walks of shame” that you’ve attempted multiple times.
In summary, “Mom and Dad” are those friends you’ve got in college that are watching out for you no matter what. They are your guardian angels at parties. They give a lot and ask little. Sometimes, they take the role because that’s how they’ve been raised, and other times it’s out of necessity. Next time you run into your “Mom and Dad,” let them know how much you appreciate them.
