Being an adult is hard. Sometimes I forget that I'm not 17 anymore. I'm not an anything-teen anymore, either. In a few short months I'll be 22, and by now, you'd think I'd have a fair understanding of how a grown adult takes care of themselves on a mental level.
Why do so many people you know have their stuff together? Can they teach you their ways? Come on, friend. I loaned you chemistry notes!
Lately I've been inspired by a friend to see things with a more positive mindset. It's hard because as it turns out, I'm a lot more of a Debbie Downer than I thought I was. It's always so easy to dish out advice and help other people than it is to heed the words you told them. So my question is, why is it so damn difficult to see yourself as 'worth it'. Why can't we just apply the advice we give to others on ourselves?
Tell yourself these things. Make sure you hear these words. Believe them, because they are true.
You're a fantastic person. You care and want to help people. But how can you help people if you feel like you're dirt? It's okay to go out and take care of yourself. Say no to things you don't want to do. Do not feel like you owe people anything. Take care of yourself first, even if that means for a day or two you just need to stay in bed and catch up on all the sleep you're missing.
Don't torture yourself over things you cannot change. If you keep telling yourself you should have done more, you're going to miss out on the present by focusing on the if-onlys and what-ifs. Take a step back. Recognize that maybe they don't want your help. This might be incredibly hard, but we feed off of one another.
Look at yourself in the mirror. Don't focus on the things you hate, but rather the things you like. Girl, look at those eyes. Beautiful. And dude, that is a strong jawline - and don't get me started on those cheek bones. Good stuff, man. Seeing the things you like about yourself and admitting to yourself that you like them, doesn't make you vain. When every other thought is "ugh, I need to lose weight" or "I feel disgusting in my body" you deserve every chance you get to love yourself.
As cliche as it is, you are your own worst enemy. I literally had a nightmare of people I care about lining up and telling me exactly why they hated me. It's all in my head, and I know that. Don't let yourself become a ball of seething negativity. Find someone you can open up. Let some light in, either by gently turning the blinds or ripping open the curtains, whatever's best for you.
Let people help you. For the love of all that is holy, let them help you. This is the hardest one for me because I'm always telling myself that I'm a burden if I keep coming back for help. You're not! I promise. Yes, sometimes people might be short with you, but it's because everyone has a life. Everyone has things going on. You can't always be the helper, sometimes you need a shoulder and maybe even a few crutches to lean on. It's okay to not be strong 100% of the time. You're so ready to help other people, let them do the same to you.
My favorite way to feel better is to plug in my headphones, find the perfect song, and go for a walk. Sometimes it's all I can do to not jump and skip and laugh and sing out loud. I don't know what does it, but I love it, and everyone deserves to feel that way.
You can still go out and try to save the world, as long as you recognize there are some things you can't fix. So why not just start with the thing you're going to be spending the most time with? You. You are worth it. You just have to see it first.
