Staying home for college... is that even a thing?

It's the thought that no one wants to consider at 18. We think our freedom will be snatched out of our hands. We think our friends will forget us. We think we will miss out on the ultimate "college experience." Lord knows, I've heard that one a thousand and seven times.

Don't get me wrong, going off to college is great in so many ways. I've seen so many people blossom and experience some of the greatest times of their lives while off at college. But this is for the ones who feel like they're not doing it right if they don't go off. You're not alone. And you're definitely not making a wrong decision by choosing to stay where you are.

Home is where we learn to talk, walk, try mom's recipes (and fail at them greatly). It's where our very first relationships are built. It's where we learn right from wrong. It's the place we can come to, at any age or time, carrying whatever life has thrown at us at that moment. It's a place of warm acceptance, love, stability, familiarity. And honestly, these are the things that have molded me into the "college girl" I am today. Why are we ready to flee the nest so quickly?

Here's a short and sweet re-cap of my college experience so far:

Applied to a big, popular university. The place I said I'd always go. Why? Eh. I mean, why not? My educational mentor said I was ready. Said my GPA looked great, my resume was plenty filled.. I had nothing to worry about... Until I did. Riding in the car I got the oh-so-dreaded news that I wasn't accepted. For about 10 minutes, my world came to a halt. My thoughts.. What? How is this even possible? I'm such a failure. What's plan B? Thankfully, I had applied to another university. Not my top pick, but hey.. anything is better than staying at home right? Got accepted, got enrolled, got an apartment, and soon after, every single direction I turned, something fell apart. Once again, my plans began to unravel quicker than I could make another one. And so the end of summer rolls around and I'm faced right smack dab in front of the mirror with the reality that I, am in fact, staying home.

Be prepared to hear:

"You won't make any new friends if you stay home." "Don't you want to join a sorority?" "Staying home is just like being in high school." And the list goes on...

So now that we've finally made it up the mountain, here's the view from the top:

I couldn't imagine doing college anywhere else except for in between my same 4 walls. Yes, there have been a lot of nights of being in bed by 10pm (something that i don't regret; Netflix doesn't leave near the hangover...) and there have been a lot of nights, down on my knees, tears flowing, asking God to open my eyes to see why He has kept me here, stuck, in the same place.

Be careful what you ask for... Not too long after starting college, my mom was diagnosed with the c word.. again. I won't go into the long gory details, but even through the trial, I finally had the greatest peace knowing that my future is seen, held, and cared for delicately. I finally felt purpose here. This was my answer as to why I was needed in this place.

I know everyone won't have such a black and white answer or reason to stay, and that's okay. You don't need a reason. Just know this: Grow where you are planted. Don't let yourself think that you're being robbed of anything in life by staying home. Looking back, I haven't been robbed of a single thing thus far. I've grown a greater appreciation for my parents than I've ever thought of having. My grades have been better than I ever thought they'd be. I've reconnected with old friends, and made some new. The safe, secure environment has pushed me to fall harder in the arms of Jesus than I ever have before. This place has allowed me to grow and flourish in the ways my soul really longs for; something that I don't think would've happened if I left. I've learned so much about who I am, who I'm NOT, and who I want to be.

Most of us can testify that home is the place where life has given us some of the GREATEST things. They say it's where the heart is for a reason, right? It's not a thief of dreams or desires. It can very well be the beginning of them.

Stay. Grow. Don't waste moments thinking you don't have them. Don't miss out, because of fear that you're missing out. Soak up college from your four walls for as long as you can. It might be the prevention of a lot of regrets later on. It just might allow you to look back and be filled with the utmost joy at who you're becoming.

Sincerely,

a girl who chose to stay