Have you ever saved up for something big? Whether you were eight years old saving for an awesome Lego set, or 16 saving for a car, most of us have saved up for a big-ticket item. For me, I like to save my money to go on trips. Traveling is costly, but if I budget my money and refuse to waste it on things I don't need, I save enough to take the occasional trip.
This obviously has nothing to do with sex. I'm just trying to make a point.
Sometimes, you have to deny yourself certain things right now to ensure that you will have something even better in the future. I denied myself trips to McDonald's and Starbucks so that I could take a trip to Winnipeg. The trip was a lot more fun and so worth skipping the fries and coffee.
So, how does that relate to sex? Like I said before, sometimes it's necessary to deny yourself something you want now and wait for something even better. Sex is meant to be the most intimate of all experiences. It is meant for two people who know each other, respect each other, are committed to each other, and love each other. In our culture, sex has become a casual Friday night activity. Hooking up is not a big deal.
However, I would argue that casual sex is NEVER a good idea.
Either one person wants more, while the other does not, or both people are content with just the physical act. Either way, they're using each other. Even if both people say it's okay, it still sucks to use people and it sucks to be used. Casual sex devalues something that was meant to be so beautiful.
Sex is powerful. It is meant to be that way! It is not meant to be casual. It is when two people "become one." If you "become one" with a lot of people, then it loses its meaning. But if you wait for the one you are willing to commit to, the one you have connected with on an emotional and spiritual level, the one who respects you, how much more will the physical connection mean?
Sex has the power to bond you to another person forever, creating the most intense, intimate human connection you'll ever experience.
Do not settle for anything less because you can't practice self control. Figure out what you need to do to wait for something that will be so much better. It will be so worth it. Something that will mean so much more than a series of hookups. So much more than your immediate pleasure. So much more. Treat sex with respect. Don't treat it as anything less than the beautiful, special, rare, intimate gift it is.