There is no such thing as casual sex. The word sex can be used in a few different contexts, (as an action of intercourse, as a differentiation between gender, as an adjective, like sexy...) but the one that springs to my mind when used in day-to-day life is the act of intercourse, which is anything but casual.

The phrase 'casual sex' is an oxymoron.

The act of sex is something which should be held as sacred and special, so placing the word 'casual' before it negates the very essence of the act.

I was raised in a family practicing a broad spectrum of religious beliefs, and regardless of those various foundations, all members of my family expressed that sex should be held as sacred between a married couple for it to be meaningful.

Growing up with this strict set of ideals made me judgmental towards the world and all its fornicators. Whenever I heard stories of a celebrity getting pregnant out of wedlock, or when I was in high school and my friends started exploring their sexualities, I lost a decent percentage of respect for their characters.

As I have matured in body, mind, and spirit, I have come to accept that the act of sex outside the binding ties of holy matrimony is going to occur and that the people who participate in said act are not bad or evil or damned or what-have-you.

As I have grown and seen more of the world, I have encountered countless different people leading countless different lifestyles. All of those lifestyles were not conventionally moral, but all of those people were happy. Regardless of whether they saved themselves or not, they acted with love and integrity.

These are two important points on which the line between casual sex and meaningful sex is drawn.

People who are no longer pure but are not linked by marriage have not performed a blasphemous act, so long as the act was performed with love and integrity: love for each other and integrity of self. These virtues can be achieved through respect.

If one respects herself, she will love herself, and if she loves herself, she will act with integrity. This level of self-respect will put in perspective how valuable she is as a human being and will, in turn, lead her to demand higher standards from those she associates herself with. If she respects herself, she will only want to interact with those who respect her. As a result, those who respect her will earn her respect. It is through this mutual respect that the virtues of love and integrity are fortified, and if the act of sexual intercourse is performed with these two things, it is not a crude act. The relationship will flourish with a solid foundation, regardless of the label of that relationship.

However, the issue arises when people completely throw away virtues and principles and turn meaningful sex into casual sex.

There is really no such thing as casual sex because sex itself is such a personal act that forms a deep bond between two human beings. Something with an effect of this caliber should not, nor could not, be taken lightly.

No longer a teenager and looking back, I realize that the set of ideals instilled in me during childhood was unrealistic because it was just that: ideal. The quintessentially perfect couple does not exist. Not everyone has the courage, strength, or understanding to hold back on such an instinctual act.

Of course, there are those out there who value abstinence with the utmost holiness, and I applaud you. But if you are on the other end of the spectrum, do not beat yourself up about it. A person has many more qualities that determine his or her value other than a V card, or lack thereof. Use yours with discretion, though. You only get one and you do not want bills that you cannot afford to pay, but it is yours nonetheless. You can patron any store you so desire, and it is your choice to buy something and swipe that precious, plastic rectangle, but do not shop for the simple act of shopping.

The fulfillment is fleeting, regardless of the immediate thrill.

I encourage individualism and freedom of self, but I also realize that the balance between responsible individuality and recklessness is a delicate thing. So, spread love, have integrity, and demand respect. With these virtues, any act and any person will retain meaning.