Because Of You, I've Learned My Worth

Because Of You, I've Learned My Worth

I have been through a lot because of you. But here I am. Still standing.

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I go past the place you used to work when I come home from school. I look for your vehicle every time in town even though I know you are at school. I know you have moved on. And so have I. But I can't help but remember what you all did to me, all the things we did together. Everything about us.

I turn on the radio and channel surf and pass the channel that you always listened to when we were in the car together. The songs you made me listen to. I hear the name of the actor you used to love seeing in movies and my hear immediately thinks of you.

You were stuck in my head for years. The boy that made my life fun. It made my life busy. The boy that would walk to me to class in the morning and would wait for me after school. I go back to that school and am filled with memories of control and helplessness. You thought of me at random times during the day. You made feel wanted. Until you didn't.

A year passed before things became different. Where I was involved in organizations at school that made me happy. You were supposed to support me. Until you didn't. You started to get more frustrated and yell more. We got into more fights. I would do anything you wanted just so things wouldn't be mad at me. I began to remember the bad times rather than the good. Our relationship was becoming hostile. You would barely say two words to me if I said something the night before that upset you.

Until one day it got better. You became more accepting of who I was. You were trying to support what I was doing. I was speaking more without being of afraid. I was speaking my mind again. I was able to voice my opinions. Yes, you read that sentence right. I was forced to feel like I couldn't speak about my opinions in fear of getting yelled at. Until you didn't.

You blew up one day. You yelled at me in your truck for minutes that felt like hours. When trying to explain myself, you hurt me. My worst fear came to life. The one I told you way back when I started dating you. You hurt me. Physically and mentally. That day, I was never the same. I stayed with you 3 months after that day in hopes that things would get better. That you would apologize. The day I broke up with you was the scariest day of my life but it was that step I had to take.

Because of you, I never thought I would be loved again. I thought I would be criticized and made fun of for the way I was. The person I was. That I was worthless. Until the next day at school. I was back to being myself. My best friend saw something in me that she hadn't seen in a long time. When I was with you, I had never been so down on myself. Every day was a struggle to get out of bed. My dreams were better than the life I was living with you.

It's been almost four years. I have my life back to about where I want to be. I've talked through the experience I went through and coped with it. Because of you, I am stronger. I know exactly who I am is perfect the way it is. I will never change anything because of a guy, especially you.

Because of you, I know exactly who I want for the future. You narrowed my search if you will. You showed me that the MAN I end up with will treat me with respect and like a princess. Someone who will communicate and talk to me calmly instead of just yelling.

I am with a man that who treats me as I expect to be treated. He treats like the princess I never knew I was. Because you made me feel like I was less than that. Because of you, this is who I am. I am strong and loved and I know what I am worth. The aftermath was messy to clean up, but here I stand.

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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If You Would Leave Your Significant Other If They Didn’t Have A Dollar To Their Name, It’s Not True Love

Money will get you anything you want, unless it's a fairy tale romance.

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We have all heard about the Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos split. Jeff Bezos's fortune amounts to 140 BILLION dollars. With that money, he could have bought absolutely anything in the world that he wanted. I mean, what would you choose to buy with that wealth? However, in the end, the one thing he couldn't buy was, clearly, a happy marriage.

Let's take a moment to imagine that you jump into the future 50 years. What aspects of your life are you reflecting on?

Are you thinking about the outfits you wore, the status you showed off with your nice car, and all the money you had to spend on things you wanted?

Or are you measuring the quality of your life through the relationships you had with others? Maybe, most significantly, a romantic relationship?

If you've turned on the radio recently, you'll know that it's no secret that one thing almost everyone desires the MOST is true love.

Our society has learned to laugh at that notion, saying that companionate/ realistic love is really the only type of romance people get in real life.

So what do we do? We turn to money. It fills all the emotional voids we have in our unfulfilling lives. Yes, our unfulfilling lives. If you were satisfied with every aspect of your life, there would be no need for spending money aside from survival essentials.

When you turn your back on the idea of true love because you deem it "unreal" and turn to money, you may as well call yourself Alexander Hamilton because you are setting yourself up for a long life of feeling unsatisfied. Because, the truth is, fairy tale romances do actually exist.

But money will never buy it for you.

In fact, it may distract you and create the illusion of true love. Just because you enjoy the fancy gifts, homes, and trips someone can provide you does not mean you are absolutely, truly, head over heels in love with them.

If you wouldn't be with your partner if they didn't have a dollar to their name, it's not true love.

You can't pay for someone to truly love you, and extravagant gifts will never buy someone's love, just their comfort.

So if you can't buy love, how do you get it?

You've been hearing this since grade school, but getting your priorities straight is a MUST.

Work is important, and earning a salary is necessary. But work and money should never be what is most important in life, and you should never prioritize money above a significant other.

Finding the person you are meant to be with takes time, and maintaining the love between the two of you is no simple task.

Always put your significant other ahead of any desire of yours. Their needs should always come first, and for them, your needs will always come first.

It's the little things that keep people madly in love, not something money can buy.

The conversations you have with each other from the heart, the extra burden you put on yourself one day to allow your significant other to sleep in, or the meal you prepare for them so they have one less thing to worry about. The little, everyday things remind your S/O that they mean the world to you. Not the amount of money they're willing to spend for you.

So next time you're counting up your money to see if you have enough to afford the next new fun thing you want, consider how worthless it actually is to the quality of your life.

Love will bring your life value. Money will you bring you materials.

Don't settle for someone you're comfortable with. Find that person you would be with if they didn't have a dime in the world because that person will make you happier than any amount of money or materials ever could.

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