Let me start out by saying my sister-in-law (then brother's girlfriend and my best friend) was/is beautiful on her wedding day. I want to make that very clear before I start out.
I remember the first dress appointment. I remember us all looking and the other girls grabbing things that fit their curvy bodies. That showed off their larger breasts and curvy butts. Then there was me, with my itty bitty titties and white girl ass.
I was a complete opposite to these lovely curvy women who I was so jealous of. They were Dominican goddesses and I was a pale, rail-thin ghost.
It wasn't anything they did really. It wasn't like the other bridesmaids were calling me out for being the skinny bridesmaid, though some did mention my size, it was more that they didn't think about my feelings on the subject. It was more about how they were choosing dresses they knew I would never look good in because of different body types.
Being the only willowy bridesmaid brought out my insecurities and my own body issues.
They didn't care or consider how I'd look in the dress they wound up in and all liking. I didn't want to feel ugly in it but I did. I didn't have the body for it.
My sister-in-law saw that while the others looked great, I looked "meh" or "okay" in the dress. Luckily, I have a wonderful sister who realized that I wasn't looking great in the choices due to my body type.
She decided because I was maid of honor, I got my own dress. One that would fit my body size. One that I would look great in, but more importantly, feel confident in.
The moral of the story is, the others didn't think of my feelings because I was skinny and so I could "fit into" anything. I felt like a child next to their curves and that's hard too.
Women think being the skinny friend is easy, but it has a lot of downsides.
I know curvy women are going to come at me for saying that and I can't begin to understand your life and how your curves affect things but try to see from my point of view too.
I'm considered less of a woman for being tiny.
I have no boobs because of my size.
I'm super short, which makes me look like a child.
I can say I'm lucky because I have a curvy tushie, but having others (even people in my family) joke about me being anorexic or saying I "only eat once a month."
Just like there are plusses and downsides to being curvy, there are downsides to being thin.
I was the skinny bridesmaid and I got to wear a beautiful dress that suited my body type.
So brides, when thinking about your bridesmaids, please think about all body sizes and make concessions so they can feel confident and look beautiful.