I saw a status on Facebook that inspired this article. As you're reading this, I want the readers to reflect on what this says about the dating world? What does this say about society?
"Obviously if i'm ignoring you, then i'm not interested. K, byee!"
First off, let's clarify that when you're ignoring someone, that is all you're doing - ignoring someone. It is not obvious to anyone but yourself as to why you choose to ignore someone. Take a step down from the high horse and remember we are all people with feelings.
The person messaging you cannot read your mind nor are they going to spend hours staring at the conversation thread wondering why you haven't texted back. Usually, you can tell through conversation if someone is 'feeling' you or not. Not being interested in someone is normal and should be communicated with the person crushing on you. Might as well if you plan on ignoring them. Someone you're not all that interested in asks you on a date? Decline, don't give some lame excuse or copout answer. Say you're simply not interested.
If someone isn't interested in you, that's okay too! Respect the person for telling you that and go on to the next. There are millions of people in the world, and to be stuck on one dude that's not into you is just a waste of time!
But what do we do when we feel led on? When you're texting someone steadily then all of sudden the crush 'ghosts' - or randomly disappears without any response.
When someone 'ghosts' it's the first assumption to think you did something wrong to make the other person stop responding. To make that assumption is a hasty generalization, something not based on logic. There are numerous reasons someone could have for not texting someone back. But first, assume that person is busy. It's the responsibility of the love interest to make that clear so someone doesn't assume they are being ignored.
More than likely, that person isn't always busy. Perhaps there are demons of doubt, unresolved issues that inhibit their ability to communicate effectively. When individuals are dealing with conflicting issues without expressing that, it more or less gets the better of them. He/She could feel like they could find someone better, someone cuter, someone with money? Searching for what the heart wants is either looking for emotional or materialistic (shallow) fulfillments. Some want a partner who can bring passion and romance to the relationship. Most only care about the body someone has or the balance in their checking account. Yes, people find both in a relationship but that's rare. Attraction is important in choosing a partner, but when do these shallow expectations go to show looks & money are not everything?
When you're solely focused on the face-value of an individual more than likely you'll never try to see that person for who they truly are. Maybe you realize a face is all that person relies on so they have a bland or crude personality.
The biggest let down is a cute guy who is an asshole.
A person who isn't fully aware of who they are deep down is going to struggle with maintaining conversation with those who take interest in them. When they are searching for something that doesn't exist, these are the people who clearly cannot stay in touch. Someone who doesn't know themselves also isn't sure what they want.
It's incredibly bothersome when someone ignores you - and it should. Unfortunately, it is something we have to put up with.
When someone doesn't text back it overwhelms the person waiting for a response with feelings of doubt. When someone shows interest and takes the time to get to know you and wonder how your day is going, it is respectful to reciprocate that. Clarify you're busy (if you truthfully are), that resolves any issues of "Is he/she ignoring me??"
You don't have to be texting each other constantly, but the lesson is to COMMUNICATE!
Care for the person you're texting? Then respect that person to let them know if you are busy. If someone is interested in you and wants to get to know you, but you for sure don't feel mutual - JUST SAY SO! Some will say, " I'm too nice, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings." - That's not a good enough excuse. You've already done the damage so finish the job with clarity. That way, no more time or energy is being wasted between the two people.
Don't always come to the conclusion that you're the problem when being ignored - because you're not. It comes to show that the other is obviously not worthy of your time. If he/she doesn't want to talk, then that's a clear representation of how ugly they feel inside which is now seen on the outside.
Have respect for yourself! Don't keep texting the black hole of unanswered messages. It's not important to wonder why they won't respond to, or wonder what you did. Stressing about the things that cannot be changed is useless. There is no point in making someone like you. That is when infatuation becomes an obsession with fantasy.
In the look for a friend, love, or whatever! Always RESPECT and COMMUNICATE with each other.
Hints are only an excuse for not having the balls to say the truth. If society has to rely on hints to understand the other person than that's embarrassing. How passive can society get?? It's funny I'm about to tell this to adults, but USE YOUR WORDS - it's all we have to express thoughts and reason.
READERS: Think about this status again.
"Obviously if i'm ignoring you, then i'm not interested. K, byee!"
Break this way of thinking amongst society. In what can be seen as 'passive society' communication and respect is lacking the most.
