It will always be one of those days that sticks out in your mind. I was sitting at the computer downstairs trying to write this god awful paper on the United Nations for my World History course. I was in my sophomore year of high school. I was frustrated beyond belief that I had to write this thing instead of getting to enjoy my winter break like a normal person. I was texting my friends who were in the same position as me. While I typed furiously, with a cup of hot chocolate, in my softball sweats fuzzy socks and a hoodie I realized how quiet the house was. I had been so caught up in my own teenage high school drama I hadn't even realized my parents weren't in the house. After asking my brother if he knew where they were I called my mom, no answer, not surprising. Opting next to call my dad who picked up quickly said they would be home soon and they needed to talk to us when they got home. I wasn't anywhere near done with that paper when they walked in the door and my dad being the straight forward type came out and said the words that would forever alter my life, "Your mom has cancer". I remember just standing there and my veins felt like they were injected with ice. My mom had said something and my dad was talking again, but I couldn't hear anything. I gave my mom a hug and went upstairs to just process everything. We eventually got into the nitty gritty details and I watched my mother battle with more grace than I have ever seen.

I knew I would do whatever I had to about being active against this terrible disease. There was a test that came to light a couple years afterwards called the BRAC gene test. From what I understood, through the Genome Project they were able to isolate and break down certain genes that have been linked to breast cancer. I've wanted this test done since I had heard about it, but it was too new and insurance companies were hesitant to cover the cost.

Fast forward eight years later, I still wanted the information, inquired with my insurance company, and got confirmation that they would cover majority of the cost if not all of it. I spoke with my doctor and she gave the go ahead and we got the ball rolling. In my mind I figured a quick blood test and if I don't have the gene I'm good to go. What I wasn't prepared for was what the actual process was like.

The team I had was great and very informative every step of the way. The first thing I had happen was I was taken back to a tiny space where my nurse explained the DNA test process and what could happen with the varying results that could come back. They didn't just test for breast cancer genes. There were a whole slew of genes that they were testing that could direct us to a predisposition towards not just one type of cancer, but the whole gamete of them. I gave a comprehensive family history of links to cancer and then I did an oral rinse DNA sample that I swear cleared my sinuses for weeks. They sent it off and when it came back that was when the whirlwind began.

I was called back in to discuss the results luckily I wasn't found directly positive for any of the genes. However, I came back with one that was determined as an unknown variant. Which is the equivalent of a ticking time bomb being put into your lap and being told well it's there but we don't know when or where it will go off or what will set it off. I was then told they were going to up my surveillance and things I thought were years down the road were now staring me in the face waiting for my decision. I was taken in for a mammogram and ultrasound and let me tell you 1. Having your boobs smashed between two plastic plates is not enjoyable. 2. If the power goes out while they are ultrasounding your boobs the images are saved. That was quite the relief. 3. Don't look at the ultrasound screen when alone in the room. You will freak yourself out with the colors they have on there and think you are riddled with cancer and start contemplating how you are still alive. The radiologist came in and told me everything was a-okay, and then informed me of my next steps that she thought would benefit me. After that I met with my doctor and shared the results and she discussed what she thought would benefit me. The very last step was meeting with the genetic counselor, discussing everything at length, and what she thought my next steps would be.

I'm not going to lie it was a lot to take in. It still is. You're always hopeful that everything comes back normal and you will have nothing to worry about. However, as my nurse told me given my family history she wasn't surprised I came back with something. The rational part of me knew the surveillance wouldn't turn up anything at 23, but you still have to reassure yourself of that as you're on that table, in that waiting room, etc. that everything will come back normal. The team that supplied me with next steps all gave me those empowering words: These are the steps we recommend, but ultimately you are your biggest advocate. I'm glad I have the information on hand. I like having that power and that feeling of I'm not going to let this defeat me.

If anyone has reservations on taking this test who has a family history of breast and ovarian cancer I strongly recommend you ditch those reservations and get it done. Yes the information that comes back could be life altering, but so is getting cancer. I'd rather my life be altered by preventative measures rather than sitting in a cold room getting a cancer diagnosis. This is something you want to get in front of, not be lagging behind on.