The most difficult part of being in a relationship is finding people who are content with my relationship. Yes, I have no obligation to validate my relationship with anyone. But, after almost two years of being with my boyfriend, I've noticed some reactions others have to my relationship that just rub the wrong way.
Dating my best friend has been one of the coolest experiences I've had so far in life, but it's led to weird feelings in the process. The biggest one is being conscious of how my relationship affects other people.
I admit, sometimes relationships can be overbearing. Couples can seem annoying or it can feel suffocating being around them. On the other hand, how can anyone be bothered by someone else's happiness? My boyfriend and I are around each other a lot- we're comfortable like that. We enjoy doing activities together and share the same hobbies, so you're bound to see us together often.
That is to say, we're not trying to rub it in your face. We don't purposely meet up with each other scheming to make everyone feel bad that they're not in our relationship. Anyone who does is probably just a mean person you shouldn't be friends with. In reality, we're just a couple who enjoys being around each other, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Nowadays, I feel there's an unspoken discomfort with seeing young couples. It's weird to see two people under the age of thirty seem serious about their relationship. I had my own fears about that when I first got with my boyfriend, but it's something I had to get over.
I learned a long time ago that I can't expect anyone to love me if I don't love myself and, over many conversations and a lot of pep talks with myself, I began to trust someone else to be in my life.
A lot of people go into relationships expecting it to fail. They expect there to be something wrong or a hidden secret they're bound to find months into a relationship instead of going into it hoping for the best. We were raised this way seeing the rates of divorce steadily rise over the years and watching cheating be more of a trend than a special case deal. While we need to recognize that those are two possibilities in a relationship, there can always be a happy ending instead of a bad one.
No, relationships are not perfect. What's great about relationships is having someone to hype you up when you don't see the best parts of yourself. When things get bad, it's nice to have someone to lean on who knows your good and bad parts. Relationships are not guaranteed, but when you get into one, just enjoy it. Support couples that you see and don't have ill feelings towards them if they're just enjoying their lives together.
Learn to thrive off each other's happiness. You don't gain anything from being mad at anyone's relationship, especially when their relationship doesn't affect you at the end of the day.
