Anxiety is a quite normal thing, from being anxious about a new place you're visiting to anxiety about your family or friends' well-being.
It happens to the best of us. Without it, you would end up in dangerous or detrimental situations.
With too much of it, you will end up in paralyzing fear about necessary choices or just crying at the simplest thought.
It's also hard to understand. Someone's anxiety might just make them cry a lot while some anxiety will trigger anxiety or panic attacks.
This is my experience with anxiety. It might be weird to someone who has never experienced it, but maybe it could help you see and feel it through the eyes of someone who has dealt with it.
If you have experienced anxiety, know you're not alone. Hundreds of millions of people of all walks of life deal with it. It's not your fault. You can't just shut it down. It's not as easy to control as everyone thinks it is.
My anxiety physically always felt like a weight. I could feel stress in most of my muscles like I had just been to the gym.
A lot of the times I'd start crying with little to no explanation. Some nights I couldn't sleep because I just couldn't stop crying enough to lay down and rest.
Mentally, it's almost like I couldn't rest. Nothing could soothe me. It'd just be a sudden burst of tears. I couldn't breathe.
Sometimes, it'd seem like I would be alone in a room even if my family was with me. I'd just want to curl up in a ball, but I also will not cry in front of people, so it'd feel like a ball of pressure right in my chest pressing from the outside in. It was the type of pain that would scare you. Then, I'd start breathing faster and the ball would grow. Usually, then, I'd just plaster on a smile and run to the bathroom and just have to cry. Slowly the ball would flow away and I'd feel better.
A lot of people think that anxiety is brought on by disturbing moments immediate before the fact but my anxiety really comes out of the blue.
To the people who have anxiety: this is not your fault. This is not something you can fix or that you brought on. My love, I know this is hard. I know you often feel that, in this state of life, it's impossible to keep going and I've felt that. I've been there.
You just have to learn POSITIVE coping mechanisms. How to keep your self together even if you feel like falling apart. Tell someone because bottling all that stuff up is not healthy. Really and truly be honest with yourself about your situation.
If you need to explain it to someone who might not understand, you can click here.
This illustration explains everything perfectly and makes it relatable.
This is Lydia Marie signing off.
Always remember....
Be you.
