An Open Letter To Those That Wander
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

An Open Letter To Those That Wander

Not all those who wander are lost.

16
An Open Letter To Those That Wander
Brooke-Adrienne Bethancourt

Dear fellow wanderers,

My fingers are flying over the keyboard, raw emotion filling my head and computer screen as I hope for one second that I’ll be able to keep my thoughts in for just one moment more...

Thoughts of the feeling of the sun on my shoulders in city park, and the opening chords of my favorite song by that one band ring through the air. The rays beat down in time with the drums and I close my eyes and smile at the way the breeze lifts the curls from my neck.
We stood at the base of the stage, hands in the air, voices raised, hearts open. My friends next to me, pulses aligned and feelings flowing from us as freely as our deep breaths of autumn air.

I cannot shake the burning desire to feel like that again. The feeling of being brilliantly, beautifully, and blindingly free. The desire to explore and travel the universe, the desire to dream big.

In the process of trying so hard to find my place at school with my friends, relationship, and personal struggles, I almost feel as though I’ve forgotten the fundamentals that make me,me. I've lost simple mechanics of myself, like how I used to write every day easily. How I used to send my thoughts flying through a pen or a keyboard, projecting every last part of me onto pages and pages of artwork. A blank space was just a new medium to express myself, waiting for me to fill it with words and thoughts that were purely my own.

Now, I dread expressing my thoughts through that medium. This is me, an artist, afraid to perform and display my art. It’s more than writer’s block.

It’s fear.

I’m afraid of admitting some things to myself out loud (or rather, on paper) that I know are true. I’m afraid that I’ll regret typing up something that I wish I would’ve left alone, something that I wish I would've kept to myself for much longer, if not forever.
But, I can’t wait any longer to feel alive again.

So here's the truth about me that I'm so hesitant to share:

I love with so much of me that it’s draining. I feel with every fiber of my being. Thus, I'm afraid to love and feel because of the way that I dive in. Suddenly, I am fully engulfed in the waves before I've even had time to stop and think about whether or not I can even swim. I am an adrenaline junkie, yet a fearful player in this risky game.
I’m afraid of letting go of the inner thoughts and feelings that I know could be beautiful if given the chance. I’m afraid to ask questions that I know may be answered. But I cannot fear for much longer.

This collection of my thoughts wasn’t brought about by my school or my parents. Not by the green-eyed boy with the dazzling smile or by my best friends who challenge and encourage me to embrace myself and my art in every way possible. This is brought about by my simple desire to thrive in that place where I once felt like I was only surviving. I want to travel back in time to where I existed as myself and only myself, to when I truly didn't care about the thoughts and opinions of people with small minds or opinions of me that weren't positive or accurate to who I am as a person. I want to let go of my anxieties, to travel daily into my own world of thoughts and words where everyone that I meet is a character in the story of my life.I want to be a writer again, a creator, a dreamer. I want to refuse to fear the response that the outside world has to my passion.

I fully intend to do just that.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

A TikTok Ban? Nope, That's Not Happening

We've seen this movie before with the popular social media app.

488
tiktok

Here we go again. There's a groundswell of support to ban TikTok in the United States.

Keep Reading... Show less
Content Inspiration

Top 3 Response Articles of This Week

Check out what's trending on Odyssey!

1574
writing on a page with a hand holding a pen as if the person is beginning to write something
c1.staticflickr.com

Looking for some inspiration to kick off your Monday? Check out these articles by our talented team of response writers! From poetry to tips for manifesting your dream life, there's something for everyone.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Exploring the Superbowl's Historic 50 Year Legacy!

Building up to next Sunday

3001
football game
astros / Flickr


The Superbowl is the biggest football event of the year, and the 50-year history of the competition has seen a lot of memorable moments. The event first began in 1967, when the first AFL-NFL World Championship Game was played in Los Angeles. Since then, the NFL has grown from a small regional competition to an international phenomenon. Over the course of the last 50 years, the Superbowl has seen some amazing plays, memorable moments and incredible records. This includes Tom Brady's record of five Superbowl titles, the first time the Patriots won three consecutive championships, and the Steelers' record of six Superbowl titles. The event has also become a cultural phenomenon, with millions of people tuning in each year to watch the big game. There are now commercials, halftime shows, and other events that make the Superbowl a true American spectacle.

Keep Reading... Show less
11 Genres Of Music That Originated From Black Culture

Numbers don't lie, up in the charts many times, black culture has defined the music industry. Music is a worldly language that can be understood by people all over the world. You bet black culture has taken over the music industry, but not from the way you may think. I'm not talking about their prominent presence in the rap game, but the origins of eleven different genres of music. Black culture is always using their heritage and ancestral knowledge to transmute the current energy to a higher frequency. Personally, I'm not surprised that many of these music genres have originated from black culture. Thankfully, I've been able to grow up in a diverse environment. I can only thrive in a diversity of friends.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The Influence Of Music

Music is more than just instruments and vocals.

2413
Elyse Music

Music is a powerful concept all on its own. There’s something alluring about being able to cut out the rest of the world, and surrounding yourself with harmonious sounds that synthesize together in a pleasant manner.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments