I was thinking a lot about whether to share this or not. After a lot of thinking, I decided to make it public. One reason is that this month is Autism Awareness Month, and what better day to share this? My other reason is that being at Berklee has made me strong and courageous. I have been going to classes and have made friends who make me feel that it is completely fine to be special. So, here goes my story!
I was born as a special child. Yes, I was very different from everyone. I couldn't communicate well enough and due to that, all of my life I never had friends. In fact, I was always bullied by my peers for being different. I used to take things very literally, and I, in fact, still do. I couldn't control my behavior and I had sensory issues. I used to react oddly and would give weird gestures. I couldn't make eye contact while speaking. I had difficulties learning. I remember, during first grade, I was kicked out of school for being special, but after begging and apologizing, they took me back in.
It wasn't until I was 14 that I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. I have always kept this inside me, because I was afraid of what people would think. It's not that I haven't tried telling people - I really have. But, even after telling them, they would, mistakenly, consider me to be mentally retarded, so I decided to keep to myself.
Now, I think that everyone needs to know. Asperger's Syndrome is not the same as mental retardation. Asperger's Syndrome is a form of Autism. People with Asperger's -
1. Take words and phrases literally.
2. Have difficulty in social and conversation skills.
3. Have difficulty with nonverbal communication such as lack of eye contact.
4. Have a tendency to discuss themselves rather than others.
5. Their movements are awkward.
6. They have obsessions with specific topics.
7. Their conversations are one-sided.
But the best part is:
8. They are intelligent and gifted with talent.
And above all:
They need love, care, and support!
Today, 90 percent of my Asperger's is gone! The only solace I had during my struggle was music. I have been singing since the age of three. I am thankful for my singing talent, as it is the one thing that people have appreciated about me. Singing has helped me reach the hearts of millions of people! Singing also made me feel good about myself, whenever I was feeling low!
Music has helped me a lot during my difficulties, and I am sure it will help other people too, who have special needs like me! This is the reason why I am into music therapy. I want to make a difference to all people with special needs. I want to make them feel better about themselves through music.
I am writing on behalf of everyone who has special needs. It's like Lady Gaga's song "Born This Way" - there is nothing wrong with the way you are! Just be who you are, and love yourself. You were born this way.
I hope after reading this, you understand me more. I can only hope that you give all of the love, care and support to those of us with special needs.
Today, I say that I am very proud and accepting of the fact that I have special needs! I am born this way, and I have no regrets!
