To my Guardian Angel,

With time, we have somehow found the grace to accept this tremendous loss. We found the strength in each other to come to terms with it. The world keeps spinning, even though it seemed to stop on that day we lost you. You learn to move forward because life forces you to. Time gives us the ability to talk about you with a smile on our faces without tears, and that's a blessing.

You deserve to be remembered in a beautiful and happy way. You were an amazing person with the most beautiful soul and the biggest, kindest heart. You were always humble in everything you did. You never judged anyone, and always saw the good in people. You deserve to have someone tell the story of your life with a big smile on their face because that's the best way to share your legacy. You always had the most contagious smile, others couldn't help but smile back. I try to keep that in mind when I talk about you today. I promise to hold my head up high like you would want me to do, and stay true to who you were and what you stood for. I promise to talk about you with a smile that inspires others to smile for the rest of their day. That's how we keep your soul alive, by smiling and radiating the warmth in our hearts when we relay your legacy. Some days it hits me that I'll never be able to talk to you again and it's almost too much to wrap my head around. It's in those devastating moments that I have to believe that somehow, you are with us. You're with us when we stand by the ocean. You're with us when we hear your favorite songs. You're still with us when we need you most, I promise to believe in that.

No one can prepare for the loss of a friend or loved one. During all of our daily interactions with the people in our lives, you never stop to think that it could be the last time. You always seemed invincible to me. You never gave up, you always stood tall, you were always so strong. You weren't scared of any adventure and always challenged yourself. You were always steady, always reliable. I mistook your steadiness for you being invincible. We take it all for granted. We just assume that the people in our lives are indestructible and that there's always tomorrow. I never could have imagined a "tomorrow" that wasn't guaranteed for you. I promise to remind everyone not to take their loved ones for granted. I promise to always value today, and remember that tomorrow is never guaranteed.

The phone call telling me that you weren't with us anymore changed my life. You never forget a call like that, what time it was, where you were, the way the world kind of closed in. I remember not being able to hear as people were trying to comfort me. I would stop crying for a while just trying to breathe, only to have it sink in once more and experience the loss all over again. I woke up the next morning after crying myself to sleep, hoping it was a horrible dream. I remember standing in a grocery store later that day and people were laughing and rushing around, carrying about their day, and I just couldn't understand how their lives were still moving. Didn't they know that the world had stopped? Everyone was just carrying on with their lives and there I was, standing still. I promise you that I will always find a way to keep moving. I promise to seize each day and appreciate the life I've been given. I promise not to lose heart and not to let life pass me by.

As painful as it was to lose you at such a young age, I don't want to focus on that hurt. You wouldn't want that. Instead, I want to focus on celebrating your life, and honoring the promises I'll always hold to you.

I promise that every time I run, I will tough it out and run the extra mile for you. I promise not to listen to sad songs when I miss you, but to play your favorite upbeat ones that we all used to listen to in the car. I promise never to forget your favorite songs. I promise to never stop hiking and enjoying nature, and to know that whenever I'm out there, you're smiling down on me. I promise to be tough. I promise to think back to the times when you would tell me not to let life push me around, and to push back when times get hard. I promise to have faith and believe with all my heart. I promise to see the good in people and the world. I promise to never stop dreaming. I promise to keep writing. I promise to carry your grace and kindness in my heart wherever I go in this world. I promise to always be there for your sister, and to always look out for her. I promise to never stop telling people about you, and to keep your memory alive.

You were like family to me. You always protected me, and were there in an instant whenever I needed you. You always had the best advice. You always found the most profound words and inspired me to be better and do better. You got me through the worst days, and smiled with me on the best. You were my best friend. It took me a long time to let go of the guilt I put on myself for taking you for granted, but I know you would tell me to stop it if you were here with us. As the years pass, I fear that I'll forget the tiniest of details, or I'll forget the sound of your laugh. I am reassured that this can't happen because we still have pieces of you here with us. Your soul shines through your sister. Your smile is your mother's. We see you in your father's eyes. As for me, I carry you in my heart. I promise to never let anyone forget you, my friend. I went to visit your sister and we sat and laughed over memories of you. We didn't cry, not once. I guess that's what time does. It doesn't heal you completely, but you learn to celebrate their life and we feel your love for us through the strong love we have for each other. You taught me so much in your short time here with me. Your kind soul and extraordinary spirit touched so many lives. You made everyone who knew you a better person and for that we are all eternally grateful. You inspired everyone you met to see the beauty in the world just by the way you looked at life. What a gift you gave to us all. We are all forever changed for having known you. I'm so honored to have been your friend.

I truly believe that you were an angel sent to me long before you became my guardian angel.

We all "Love you for always."

Note: This article was written for and inspired by my dear friend, Derek Winn Russell. Derek was a big fan of dreaming and dreamers. In honor of his memory I ask that you never stop "Dreaming With Reality." That's his biggest legacy to the world.