Congratulations! You have most likely graduated college, and, if you haven't don't worry--you will eventually. Keep this article saved and look back at it from time to time because I am here to tell you something that nobody at your college or university will tell you:
Nobody else knows what they're doing either.
As a 10-year-old living in western Massachusetts, I grew up playing ice hockey. I fell in love with it at a very young age. I also fell in love with nearly every girl I saw. So, as with most kids, I began to imagine what my future would hold, and, as with most elementary schools, the assignments of writing a journal entry of, "what do you want your future to be?" caused social anxiety and existential crises all around. Not for little Brandt, though. No. I knew that I would be married, have one or two kids and I'd be playing in the NHL for the Toronto Maple Leafs. Looking back now, as an unmarried, single, 25-year-old, I can see just how distorted my certainty was, but I wouldn't change that for the world.
Having so much hope is one of the greatest things about being a child. There is no shame in being certain when you're that young because "21 years old is when people are able to 'do it'" (seriously, a straight quote from my childhood journal). Let's be completely honest, though. There are very few among us who have dreams as children that remain unchanged and come to fruition. Yes, there are some people like my mother who, from the time she was in second grade, knew she wanted to be a teacher, and, as of today, has received a doctoral degree in education and loves what she does. "Don't compare yourself to you mother. She is an anomaly, and is one of 'those people.'" We all have those people. DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO THEM.
These are 3 things I have learned from college that were never directly taught to me:
1. Change, uncertainty, and you, yourself, are going to be the three things you will always have surrounding you.
Count on yourself.
2. NEVER compare yourself to another person.
Trust me, they don't know what they're doing either. They may seem confident and like they have everything together, but they're just as confused as you.
3. Do things for yourself.
If you are completely living for another person, you will never feel fulfilled. There is a difference between being selfless and being walked all over.
My 25th birthday was May 13th, 2016. I know what makes me excited and I know what I love. Another thing I have come to accept is that, ADULTING IS EFFING HARD!!! This is the reason not to look around at others. It's probably going to only confuse and annoy you. You're going to look at Facebook and see that Stephanie just got married, Jen just bought a house, Mark and Amanda just had another kid, and here I am months out of college, living with my parents, hoping to even hear a response from the 16 "entry-level" jobs to which I just applied. What is life anymore? Yeah, it's going to happen sooner rather than later, and it's going to confuse the hell out of you. But here's the best part: THESE PEOPLE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEY'RE DOING. You can ask them and they'll say that everything is wonderful, but come on, really? Everyone moves at their own pace.
Nobody told us that as millennials that, once we graduated college, things don't look like Carrie Bradshaw's life, or like any movie we've ever seen. We don't unite at coffee shops like in "Friends." We don't stand together and dance in protest. We don't show up to our 10-year high school reunions with fancy cars and children. We unite under a belief that most people hate to admit. It's not dissimilar to an addiction meeting. So let's say this together, as a mantra, and keep it honest.
Repeat after me: "Hi. My name is _____________. I have a degree in ____________. I am _______ years old and, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING."
Hi. My name is Brandt Bechard. I have degree in Business Administration: Management, and a degree in Automotive technology with a concentration in Street Rod Custom Fabrication. I am 25 years old, and I have no idea what I'm doing.
Welcome to your 20s. It's going to be a wild ride and you're going to face challenges, hardships, and adversity. You're going to lose friends/weight/the remote, gain friends/weight, and somehow, maturity. Don't worry about your pace. Don't worry about what other people are doing. Just remember that we are all doing this. We can and will make it out the other side. Congratulations on graduation. This is your 20s. This is adulting.
