For those of you that may not know, I consider myself a wallflower. Every day I observe; I simply watch things, I understand them, and usually I just keep quiet about them. I’m not often the one to initiate a conversation, and if I do I usually plan what I want to say over and over again in my head. I’m not often the one to be the center of attention, and usually when I am I blush like no other. Rather, I’m often the person you see with my close friends, listening and laughing. I’m the person you see sitting alone with my cup of coffee, just watching the day go by.
I am a wallflower, but life that way isn’t so hard; life that way is actually kind of nice. This is why I know all of the other wallflowers out there will probably agree with what I am about to say.
I am a wallflower, but I am also a leader.
I was a natural born leader, in fact. From high school on, I was leading every organization I could get my hands on. I am that person who has that long list of leadership positions on her resume; vice president of the pre-medical society, secretary of the honors program, president of my sorority. Being a wallflower almost made me a better leader. It allowed me to observe both disdain and happiness, it allowed me to listen to other’s opinions, and it allowed me to understand why people felt the way they did; those attributes are the ones that made me most successful as a leader.
I am a wallflower, but I am also an activist.
I may not be the first person to speak up about myself, but I will be the first to speak up for others. I feel very strongly about the groups I associate with. I also feel very strongly about groups I may not associate with, but I nevertheless understand. I will stick up for victims of sexual assault, I will stick up for the LGBTQ community, I will stick up to men who may be acting misogynistic, and I will stick up to elders who continue to put the millennial population down. I can do this because, as a wallflower, I can see and understand oppression, and it is something I no longer want to see.
I am a wallflower, but I am also a companian.
Many may think a relationship with a wallflower is hard, but when you find the right match things will still fall into place. I was actually the one to sit down next to my boyfriend and initiate a conversation, because I observed long enough to know that it was going to regret it if I didn’t. I do okay in relationships because I listen, I process, and I formulate my words as necessary. No I am not perfect, yes we often sit in silence at night, but it is perfect in its own way and I would not change it for anything.
I am a wallflower, but I am also successful.
Some people do not understand how an introvert, a wallflower, can have a successful career. The quietness must make it hard to flourish in an interview, the listening rather than speaking must make it hard to ask for a promotion, the "wallflower-ness" must make working with others tough, right? Well, I have a job I love, a job I interviewed for and have succeeded in. I have accepted more and more responsibilities as the months go on, and I will continue to do so. I work well with my coworkers, and though we may not chat about our daily lives constantly, we still thrive as a team. Being a wallflower does not hold me back, and there is no reason it ever will.
I am a wallflower but don’t worry, I do alright in life.
