3. You don't realize how much you're craning your neck until you talk to someone as short as you. | The Odyssey Online
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5 Untold Struggles Of The Short Friend

It's not always fun being fun-sized!

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5 Untold Struggles Of The Short Friend

In This Article:

I'm the Short Friend. I've been the Short Friend since about the seventh grade. I'm the one who stands in the front of the photos, gets made fun of for their height, and still shops in the kids department.

This article is not for the Almost Short Friends, i.e. the 5'3" and 5'4" Friends. No no, this is for the Actually Short Friends, i.e. the Barely Scraping 5'1" and shorter Short Friends.

1. Not wearing makeup is like stepping in a time machine

Overslept and didn't get a chance to put on makeup? Or just didn't feel like it? Or, you're not wearing makeup and you're wearing a plain shorts and t-shirt combo?

Yeah, good luck passing for your age.

The only time I was ever carded when ordering alcohol in Spain, where the legal drinking age is 18, and I am a 20 year old 5' gal, was when I filled in my eyebrows, wore a baseball cap, a pair of leggings and a t-shirt. The waitress asked for my ID and I was almost offended, because no one is carded in Spain unless they look like they're teetering the line of 15 or 16. I get it, I'm short, but I had bought alcohol at the grocery store in less makeup and no one batted an eye.

However, getting carded until you're 30-something is a common practice in the US, so I can't say this example applies to everyone ordering alcohol, but some people will question whether you're old enough to drive or work if you have a bare face.

2. "Wow, how tall are you?!"

I don't understand this. I don't walk up to girls with big boobs and ask them for their bra size, nor do I walk up to guys with small feet and ask what size shoes they wear. Again, I get it, I'm short, but it's not that big of a deal to me, so it shouldn't be a big deal to you. Chances are, you're taller than me, so why do you really need to know my exact height?

3. You don't realize how much you're craning your neck until you talk to someone as short as you.

Seriously, you get so used to looking up at people! And then you meet a fellow Short Friend or a 12 year old and think, "Wow, this is how average height people live."

4. Hugging your friends is just asking for a face full of boob for you and makeup on their shirt for them. Awkward.

I wind up being face-to-chest with most of my friends, so hugging them ends up with either me going for the side hug or trying to climb them like they're a tree so I don't have to smush my face into their boobs and/or get my makeup all over their shirt. Does anyone else think about this?! It's just an awkward scenario, in my opinion, but it's why I almost always try to be the one wrapping my arms around the other person's neck when I go in for a hug--that way they have to bend down so my head can look over their shoulder.

Life hack, yo.

5. You face retail discrimination

Jeans are sold at most places in four lengths. Short, regular, long, and extra long.

Yes, tall girls often struggle to find clothes/pants long enough for their legs, and I get that, and understand why extra long lengths are a thing and should be a thing. But why doesn't anyone sell extra short, huh?

Now, you non-Short Friends reading this might just think, "Can't you just cuff/hem your pants?" I'm glad you asked. Not all pants can be cuffed and not all pants need to be cuffed and sometimes you just don't want to have to cuff/hem EVERY SINGLE PAIR OF PANTS YOU OWN!?

And, you're also probably thinking, "What's an extra inch of fabric really doing for you? It's not that big of a deal!"

HA!

Wrong!

Those short jeans you see in the stores? You know them? Yeah?

Well, they're usually about 4-5" too long for my little legs, still. And no, that's not because I'm buying, for example, a size 12 short, which in theory would have a fairly long inseam due to the larger waist size. Nope. I wear a 0 or a 2, which is generally the smallest size in length and waist. If that small size is still too long for me, imagine what a bigger Short Friend deals with when they buy jeans! It's madness, I tell you! Madness!

Short girls also have the option of buying clothes from the petite section, yet most stores that even have a petite section only cater to elderly petite women. Short consumers aren't all elderly! C'mon, man! I want cute clothes that fit!

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