If you watch any movie with a single mom she’s usually portrayed as harebrained, helpless and always looking for a man. This representation has led many people who aren’t familiar with single moms to believe that they really are unreliable in all aspects. Well, I was raised by a single mom who was far from helpless and desperate and unreliable. She is warmhearted, intelligent, confident and could hold her own without ever faltering. There is no other person I would have wanted to grow up with. Without a doubt there are countless reasons that having a single mom is amazing, but here are just the top five perks of having a single mom.

1. No Good Cop, Bad Cop

Now maybe this isn’t actually a thing in all families with multiple parents, but I have most certainly seen it before. Let’s say you get an F on a test and have to tell your parents. You get grounded. But that weekend you really wanted to go to a movie with your friends, so you ask your parents. One parent is all for it while the other parent…not so much.

Growing up with a single mom I never had this, and I’m so glad. With a single mom she will tell you how it is from the get-go. If I came home with a bad grade, we talked about it. There was no conflicting opinions on the situation, just a conversation. When the weekend came, if I wanted to go out with friends I just asked and she would remind me that I needed to focus on my grades but if I thought it was a good idea to go out I could. Just having my mom saved me from being stuck between Officer Good and Officer Not-So-Good.

2. Dr. Phil: The Bodyguard

We all have issues in life. Whether it be in school, at work or with your family, at some point everyone experiences a disagreement with someone. It’s completely normal. What might not seem so normal to everyone in the world is having a personal body guard who doubles as a shrink.

Any time I had got into a scuffle with anyone growing up and now, my mom was the first person I would tell. Why? She always knew exactly what to say. I’d be offered kindhearted advice and be told that I didn’t need anyone in my life who made me unhappy as long as I was willing to accept that I would have to move on. To this day some of the best advice I have ever gotten has come from my mom. But after the advice, I had John Cena as a bodyguard. It took inhumane amounts of strength for my mom to not go after anyone who had hurt me—no matter how minor it was. That type of respect and love as a child taught me to hold myself at a higher standard and to never let anyone use me as a welcome mat.

Of course almost every parent is helpful to and protective of their child or children, but there is something inexplicable about the way a single mom watches out for her child with an eagle’s eye.

3. Full Attention

I am an only child and I have a single mom. Not a day goes by that I don’t have my mom’s undivided attention. Yes, I consider this a perk. Even when she is texting me while I’m trying to study or eat I don’t see it as annoying or “hovering.” Without her full attention, I never could have been who I am today. I wouldn’t know how to use a power drill or how to paint nails. I never would have been taught how to wear makeup or how to change a light bulb. Her constant awareness of me gave me confidence to do things because I knew she would be there to catch me if I fell and that she would be there to hug me if I made it.

Just having the two of us as, what I consider to be, a perfect family gave us plenty of movie and pizza nights, beach trips, train rides to Washington, D.C. and memories that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Because I had her undivided attention she knows when something is wrong before I even say it and she knows how to handle it without causing me upset. She can tell when something amazing has happened and I haven’t told her yet. But most amazingly, she knows exactly how to cheer me up and remind me that she loves me. Could you ask for more from your mom? Nope.

4. Fan Base

In 3^rd grade I sang “Wake Up” by Hilary Duff for our talent show. I was terrified to say the least. I walked onto the stage and looked at the 300 plus people staring at me and then in the audience I saw my mom. Not one note had come out of me yet and she was already smiling like I had just sung the National Anthem at the World Series.

Sometimes it posed a struggle for my mom to make a concert or school event. As a single mom she was working hard to support her and I on her own, but she never put anything above being my biggest fan. From my first soccer game to my acceptance into a club I knew I could count on her to be the first to congratulate me even on a loss. The never ending fanfare taught me a few things. One, to appreciate everyone and everything that helps you achieve your goals even if the turn out isn’t what you wanted. Two, no matter where I go, no matter how lonely I feel, I will always have my number one fan.

5. My Best Friend

A conversation I have a lot with my mom is how our relationship has developed and metamorphosed into what it is today. When I was younger I knew my mom was always my mom before anything else, but I also knew she was my friend. As I grew up I could see the two playing fields leveling out. Fast forward to me as a college sophomore and my mom 100 miles away—she is my best friend. I still know she is my mom, but when I talk to my crush or get into a fight with a friend I tell her right away. She knows all the wrongs and rights about my life and knows every decision I make, bad ones included.

While I do not doubt that having a close-knit relationship with a parent in a conventional family is completely possible, there is something unique and irreplaceable about the relationship that is developed when one person is everything to you as a baby, child, teenager and young adult. There was no interference by another parent or family member. Every good we cherish and every bad we overcame was created by just the two of us. That is something that is genuinely special to a single mom and her child.

If you have both parents I don’t dislike you, but I don’t envy you either. Just as you have your happiness with your family I have mine with my mom and I. So when the media shows you attention-seeking single moms who are confused, just think again. There are truly amazing single mothers out there who deserve positive recognition for their hard work and big hearts and open arms.