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30 Marriage Lessons From My Parents On Their 30th Anniversary

What is the secret to a lasting relationship? To "remember that the person that will be there through it all is your spouse. They are your best friend."

Jackie White

Nov 22, 2020

Texas A&M University

4190

30 Marriage Lessons From My Parents On Their 30th Anniversary

Jackie White

After my parents' 30th anniversary this October, I began to reflect on the importance that their relationship has had in my life. I became appreciative of the wisdom they have shared with me throughout the years and thought it would be selfish to keep that wisdom to myself!

That being said, I decided to interview my Mom and Dad about what the secret to a lasting relationship is. Here are some pieces of advice from the mouths of my parents themselves:

1. Marriage is two imperfect people forgiving each other every single day.

2. Don't sweat the small stuff.

3. Have a shared set of beliefs and values.

4. Pray together daily.

5. Pray for your spouse daily.

6. Pray for your marriage daily.

7. Find laughter throughout the day. Laughter does good like a medicine. Keep your humor and don't take yourself too seriously.

8. Be spontaneous!

9. Find couples that are likeminded. You must have friends in common that don't just tolerate you, but celebrate you.

10. Never go to bed angry.

11. Remember that your spouse's job is not to make you happy. Joy must come from a higher source.

12. Become interested in your spouses interests. It's not all about you!

13. Be deliberate about scheduling date nights. You have to continue to keep the spark going!

14. Marriage is hard work. Don't give up.

15. Give daily affection. In the midst of your shared routine, something as simple as a hug or a kiss communicates to your spouse that you love them.

16. Remember that marriage is a sacred promise-- it is a promise to love one another, for better or for worse.

17. If tempers escalate, sometimes it is best to walk away, cool down, and revisit a disagreement.

18. Go to Texas A&M games together! Gig'em!

19. Be sincere and vulnerable. Vulnerable communication is vital. If you can't be vulnerable to your spouse, who can you be vulnerable to?

20. Be intentional about listening. You have two ears and one mouth. Use them in that order.

21. Do activities that make your spouse happy! If your spouse likes classic movies, watch classic movies with them. If your spouse loves sports, go to sports games with them.

22. Don't ever be afraid to go to professional counseling-- that is the sign of a healthy relationship.

23. Anything worth keeping is worth discipline. Love is an action as well as a feeling.

24. Don't ever forget the big dates (anniversary, birthdays, etc.). These are annual opportunities to celebrate one another.

25. Learn to respond versus react.

26. Share your life goals together. Ask your spouse, "where do you see us in 10 years? 15? 20?"

27. Seek to understand and empathize.

28. You can't tell the person you love that you love them enough. You simply cannot overdo this expression. Tell this to your spouse daily.

29. Negatives will always be there. Find the positives in every situation that you and your spouse find yourself in.

30. Marriage evolves in every season. Friends come and go, and kids grow up and embark on their own life journey. Remember that the person that will be there with you through it all is your spouse. They are your best friend.

Everyone who knows them loves them, but none more than me! They have taught me to always err on the side of grace, live life in constant celebration, and love others without reproach - they do so with me and with each other. Mom and Dad, thank you for teaching me about love!

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30 Marriage Lessons From My Parents On Their 30th Anniversary

What is the secret to a lasting relationship? To "remember that the person that will be there through it all is your spouse. They are your best friend."

1. Marriage is two imperfect people forgiving each other every single day.

2. Don't sweat the small stuff.

3. Have a shared set of beliefs and values.

4. Pray together daily.

5. Pray for your spouse daily.

6. Pray for your marriage daily.

7. Find laughter throughout the day. Laughter does good like a medicine. Keep your humor and don't take yourself too seriously.

8. Be spontaneous!

9. Find couples that are likeminded. You must have friends in common that don't just tolerate you, but celebrate you.

10. Never go to bed angry.

11. Remember that your spouse's job is not to make you happy. Joy must come from a higher source.

12. Become interested in your spouses interests. It's not all about you!

13. Be deliberate about scheduling date nights. You have to continue to keep the spark going!

14. Marriage is hard work. Don't give up.

15. Give daily affection. In the midst of your shared routine, something as simple as a hug or a kiss communicates to your spouse that you love them.

16. Remember that marriage is a sacred promise-- it is a promise to love one another, for better or for worse.

17. If tempers escalate, sometimes it is best to walk away, cool down, and revisit a disagreement.

18. Go to Texas A&M games together! Gig'em!

19. Be sincere and vulnerable. Vulnerable communication is vital. If you can't be vulnerable to your spouse, who can you be vulnerable to?

20. Be intentional about listening. You have two ears and one mouth. Use them in that order.

21. Do activities that make your spouse happy! If your spouse likes classic movies, watch classic movies with them. If your spouse loves sports, go to sports games with them.

22. Don't ever be afraid to go to professional counseling-- that is the sign of a healthy relationship.

23. Anything worth keeping is worth discipline. Love is an action as well as a feeling.

24. Don't ever forget the big dates (anniversary, birthdays, etc.). These are annual opportunities to celebrate one another.

25. Learn to respond versus react.

26. Share your life goals together. Ask your spouse, "where do you see us in 10 years? 15? 20?"

27. Seek to understand and empathize.

28. You can't tell the person you love that you love them enough. You simply cannot overdo this expression. Tell this to your spouse daily.

29. Negatives will always be there. Find the positives in every situation that you and your spouse find yourself in.

30. Marriage evolves in every season. Friends come and go, and kids grow up and embark on their own life journey. Remember that the person that will be there with you through it all is your spouse. They are your best friend.

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

12. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?

13. What is your ideal date night?

14. Who was/is your celebrity crush?

15. What's a good way to cheer you up if you're having a bad day?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Can you describe yourself in three words?

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