College is the time in our lives when we have a lot of new experiences. Most of these experiences are with our close friends or roommates, and they create memories that will last a lifetime.
As one of four roommates, Sophia Petrillo from “The Golden Girls” knows how we all feel when we experience these moments in college.
1. When your friend catches you up on their weekend adventures.
“How long is this story? I'm 80; I have to plan.”
2. Cooking for the first time in your apartment.
“Everyone is fine no one died, the home burnt down.”
3. Getting your first internship, and then finding out that it’s non-paying.
“Congratulations. Now you can get any job involving a cardboard hat.”
4. When your friend models what she’s wearing out to the Townhouses.
“It's too tight, it's too short, it shows too much cleavage for a woman your age.”
5. That time your friends judged you for drinking too much.
“I wish I could give her one of my kidneys; let her get up all night.”
6. Being told by your roommates to eat quieter when they are studying.
“These are Fritos, what do you want me to do, swallow them whole?”
7. When the syllabus says that the exam is next week, but the professor assigns it earlier.
“Tooth fairy, Santa Claus, Easter Bunny — I've been messing with your head for almost 60 years.”
8. Leaving the library with friends at 3 a.m. during finals week.
“He's alive alright, I poked him with a stick!”
9. The first time you have an existential crisis about your future.
“So, who's for popcorn?”
10. When you get a notification from the mailroom that you have a package.
“Your brother Phil, God rest his brain, sends the stupidest gifts, what kind of present is dental floss?”
11. Hearing your neighbors stumbling down the hall in the middle of the night.
“Oh, my God! Now she's with the other boyfriend! It's like living with Cher!”
12. Visiting with your parents on Family Weekend.
“I'm goin' out with my friends. Can you give me some money?”
13. Seeing your roommate’s dirty dishes piled in the sink.
“Well, I'm leaving. I found a compatible roommate. Here's my new address and phone number.”
14. The second time you have an existential crisis about your future and your friends witness it.
“Hey! You're not going to ask me what's wrong?”
15. Realizing that you shouldn’t have waited until the night before to start studying.
“I'm dying, Dorothy, Saturday night at 9, don't make any plans.”
16. Trying to speed up the process of getting dinner with friends when they’re busy.
“I moved that safe to the attic like you told me, can I have food now?”
17. Going to the first “darty” of the year at the beach.
“You drink out of a brown paper bag and suddenly everybody's your friend.”
18. When the professor starts explaining why the papers still are not graded.
“Excuse me, Rose. Have I given you any indication at all that I care?”
19. When someone knocks on your door as you’re cramming for a final.
“I hope it’s death!”
20. Listening to your friend tell you that they need to lose weight.
“The last time you went on a diet you turned into that guy from 'Silence of the Lambs', you did everything but butter my face.”
21. Finding a partner for a class project that you understand nothing about.
“It's great bringing two idiots closer together.”
22. Going home for the holidays and being asked what you did that semester.
“The same thing I do every day, I bought a nectarine.”
23. Sleeping in with your roommate on the weekend.
“You could light firecrackers in his nostrils, you won't wake him.”
24. When the professor tells your classmates that there won’t be a curve.
“I told them that two days ago. Tell them something new for $150.”
25. When your roommate promises not to eat a snack without you and you promise not to spend an hour in the shower.
“See that? Now we're both liars!”
