20 Things Swim Instructors Can Relate To
Start writing a post
Sports

20 Things Swim Instructors Can Relate To

All the painful, hilarious truths of the job you love anyways.

1070
20 Things Swim Instructors Can Relate To
MedicalDaily

In my past few years of being a swim instructor, I've realized a few things are universally true for all of us. Kids say and do crazy things. You get kicked, splashed, and harassed. You fear you may never be dry again.

But at the end of the day, no matter how exhausted you are, you're still proud of what you do. And you can definitely relate to a lot of this...

1. Nothing crazy a kid says can surprise you anymore

Yeah, you've heard kids say a lot of really weird stuff. A six-year-old once calmly told me that the pool jet was shooting in his a**. Can't make this stuff up, people.


2. Your normal voice is not the same as in your "in the pool" voice

Also known as your "talking to small children" voice. You know the one.


3. You laugh with coworkers about the weirdest thing a kid has done that week

"Oh, yours called a shark a 'donk'? Well, mine threw up a little on the side of the pool and then pretended it didn't happen and tried to keep swimming." (Yes, true stories.)


4. You're set on what you call elementary backstroke and hate the other names

Tickle, T, Touch...? Little Bird, Big Bird, Flap...? Ummm, no. Chicken, airplane, soldier is the only real option.


5. You've made up your own personal analogies and games that would sound crazy to anyone else

"No, you're not allowed to splash me in the face until we finish making the cake, putting all the apples in the basket, and counting all the ceiling stars! We've been over this!"


6. You know the real definition of helicopter parents

You know, the ones crouched perpetually two feet away from you, staring, taking 800 photos and yelling advice to their children every few seconds?


7. You use way too much conditioner and hair repair product

Ahh, the charming crunchiness of constant chlorine hair. Your days off are a hair respite as much as a mental one.


8. You have ten different strategies for teaching each stroke

And you know you have a rough student when all ten of the strategies fail to make any difference.


9. You no longer panic when kids start to cry

"Oh, you don't want to be here? Neither do I, but at least I got in the water!"


10. You have to buy a new swimsuit every few months

Because yours is literally disintegrating and sagging in all the worst ways. Such a classy look.


11. You have crazy fast reflexes because of how many times you've grabbed kids when they've leaped off walls without warning

*Casually grabs three-year-old out of the air and places them back on the wall while looking the other direction and continuing to teach*


12. You refer to levels by a random hierarchy of fish or sports teams without being phased

(And then you have to learn a whole new system if you get a different job.) "Well, there's Pike 1, Pike 3, Eel, Ray, Polliwog, Fish, Flying Fish...wait, did I skip Pike 2?"

13. You still despise getting splashed in the face

Yes, no matter how often it happens, you will never stop hating that.


14. You've been kicked in so many painful places, so many times

How are these kids so strong when they're kicking you, yet can't seem to kick enough to keep themselves from drowning??


15. There are some kids that just look like they're always drowning

*To the lifeguard who jumped in to "save" a kid in my class: "That's just how he always swims!"*


16. You still dream that one day when your teaching will magically turn your students into pros

And yet it just doesn't seem to work like that no matter how flawless a teacher you are.


17. Sometimes it takes a major self-pep talk to convince you to get in for another lesson

And you definitely don't always want to listen to yourself.


18. You're probably becoming a real mermaid

I mean, you're in the water enough....dreams might just come true...


19. You're tired of having frozen hair anytime you leave work in the winter

Yet another excellent look we get to rock.


20. You have an awesome job and you let everyone know it

Even on your worst days, being a swim instructor is where it's at.


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

18160
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

946731
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

123351
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lots of people sat on the cinema wearing 3D glasses
Pinterest

Ever wonder what your friend meant when they started babbling about you taking their stapler? Or how whenever you ask your friend for a favor they respond with "As You Wish?" Are you looking for new and creative ways to insult your friends?

Well, look no further. Here is a list of 70 of the most quotable movies of all time. Here you will find answers to your questions along with a multitude of other things such as; new insults for your friends, interesting characters, fantastic story lines, and of course quotes to log into your mind for future use.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments