20 Things I'd Do To Get Out of Finals

20 Things I'd Do To Get Out of Finals

I'm desperate.
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With the end of the quarter only one week away, the excitement of Spring Break approaching is literally tangible. But first... Finals. I personally believe that finals are unjust, inhumane, and should be outlawed. But since I can't be president for another 17 years, I'll just have to tough them out. Below are 20 things I'd do, believe it or not, to get out of taking my finals.

1. Go to LACMA for the sole purpose of observing the art.



2. Go to the beach and shovel my way to china.

Might take a few years... but you do what you gotta do.


3. Ding dong ditch all the Frat houses.

Maybe this guy will come out and look for me.


4. Refer to myself only in the third person for a week.

5. Watch 50 Shades of Grey with my parents.

6. Walk around campus with a rolling backpack.


7. Change my last name to Trump on all social media platforms.

8. Learn hieroglyphics.

I have no idea what this is, but I'm 100% sure it's less complicated than my Econ homework.


9. Read the Oxford Dictionary.



10. Give a speech to congress while highly intoxicated.


11. Like my ex’s photo on Instagram from 47 weeks ago.

I might have to change my name and flee the country, but sometimes you have to choose your battles.


12. Do a juice cleanse.. for like five years.

I might starve to death, but a GPA is forever.



13. Apply to jobs with my third grade email address.


14. Watch a silent film.


15. Take a dip in the UCSB lagoon.

Looks inviting.


16. Be the subject of a police chase.

O.J. Simpson style.


17. Watch professional golf.


18. Introduce my imaginary friend to every new person I meet, for a whole week.


19. Eat soup with a fork in public.


20. Eat a giant carrot on the quiet floor at the library.

Yup.. finals are THAT bad.

Cover Image Credit: The odyssey

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100 Of The Best Vines Of All Time

Hi, welcome to Chili's!
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Not to be dramatic, but the Vine app was the best thing to ever happen to me.

The Vine app truly understood me and my extremely odd sense of humor. When it was shut down, I felt like a part of me shut down with it. Luckily, I still have the ability to reflect on the good times that I had with Vine. Although there aren't any new Vine videos keeping my spirit alive, the Vine videos from the past are enough to keep me going.

This is way overdue, but here are the 100 best Vines to ever exist (in no particular order).

1. You better stop.

2. Come get y'all juice.

3. WTF is up Kyle.

4. That is NOT correct.

5. Mr. Postman.

6. Good evening.

7. This is your space, this is your area.

8. Honestly not sure what to title this one, but it's great so.

9. Someone help Elmo.

10. Pst...what?

11. Can I get a waffle?

12. Welcome back to Jesus Christ Hotline.

13. Oooooh, my boy going to school.

14. Lebron James.

15. #1 Dad.

16. Two bros chillin' in the hot tub.

17. Iz the fourth of July.

18. You have to say that you're fine and you're not really fine.

19. Tweaka Tweaka.

20. Hi, welcome to Chili's.

21. What up, I'm Jared.

22. If you wanna be a dog, RUFF.

23. When you think you look fresh, but your fish disagrees.

24. Rat in Walmart.

25. I'm dying... without me?

26. White ppl will turn anything into a casserole.

27. So you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift.

28. You want a french fry? Eat a french fry.

29. ifyoulikemakingloveatmidnight.

30. Ms. Keisha.

31. Girl you're thicker than a bowl of oatmeal.

32. My cinnamon apple.

33. Two shots of vodka.

34. Whoever threw that paper.

35. Wow.

36. Do the math.

37. Rip your face off.

38. Fed up teacher.

39. You can't kill me.

40. Look at me now snake.

41. Walking a duck.

42. No matter when you pause this one, it's hilarious.

43. I don't even understand this one.

44. I dropped my hot pocket.

45. I thought you were American.

46. I can't swim.

47. I wanna be a cowboy.

48. I look like Mona Lisa.

49. Look at this graph.

50. Yungman.

51. Squidward dabbing

52. Living with Nicholas Cage.

53. If Tinder had video profiles.

54. Why you always lying.

55. Chicken wing ch-chi-chicken wing.

56. Uh my chicle.

57. Love the Nickleback version.

58. Any excuse to nae nae.

59. I want to be famous.

60. That's my opinion.

61. There she goes.

62. I have to restart my potatoes.

63. And they don't stop coming.

64. Cat horn.

65. Who is she.

66. The bob.

67. Summertime.

68. Do I look like.

69. Nice Ron.

70. Mom hearing 'Only' by Nicki Minaj for the first time.

71. Happy fourth of July.

72. I'm washing me and my clothes.

73. Nickel the creatorback.

74. Give me your money.

75. U stoopid.

76. Shrek at school.

77. Patricia honey can you be quiet.

78. No baby.

79. You've got a big storm coming.

80. Out shopping with my coven.

81. Extreme makeover home edition.

82. They were roommates.

83. White girl trying to remember the day she was born.

84. xoxo, gossip girl.

85. Big time rush.

86. Scared grandma throwing milk.

87. Suicide fairy.

88. Zoey 101 microwave.

89. When you leave your makeup on after a night out.

90. Crazy skateboarding tricks.

91. Noodle head.

92. Under all that makeup.

93. Marriage goals.

94. Boy putting on lipstick.

95. When you walk past your friend's class.

96. Clear elevator jamming.

97. #RunningManChallenge

98. T-T-T-T-Target.

99. We all have a lot of laughs.

100. High school musical.

Honestly, I still can think of 100 more of the greatest vines of all time... but I guess I should stop now.

Cover Image Credit: NY Mag

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Poetry On Odyssey: Goodbye

All good things must come to an end.

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Odyssey, you and I have had some good times together. We've laughed, cried, gotten too deep about simple things, and everything in between, but I'm afraid this can't keep going on forever. It's time that I move on to different things with my life. I promise I'll never forget you:

Just as summer fades,
Beckoning the autumn leaves,
So, it seems, shall I.

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