Being a college student in the United States demands a lot of you: you must be studious, you must be stylish and you must be up for anything. However, some of us are less up for anything than everyone else. Some of us are actually senior citizens in the bodies of college students. What do you do when you are invited to a crazy party, but you really just want to sleep? You embrace your inner old person, of course. Here are 15 signs that you, too, are an old "fogey" disguised as a dapper young lass or lad.
1. You like listening to records.
You love those repackaged modern hits, of course, but you also love you some jazzy cocktail piano music from time to time.
2. You crave routine.
No matter how much you try to avoid it and be adventurous, you always end up falling into a strict routine. It's not pretty when something happens to disrupt your intricate daily structure.
3. You're all about control and moderation.
You don't always succeed in your attempts at self-control, but it's always what you're striving toward. You just can't understand how all of your loose and crazy friends successfully manage their lives.
4. Your cat is your best friend.
Your cat is cuddly, comforting and always there for you. What more do you need?
5. Sometimes your bones pop or ache.
You sometimes catch yourself jokingly saying, "Oh, my aching (insert body part here)." But are you really joking?
6. You rarely stay up past 12:30 a.m.
In the rare event when you are awake in the wee hours of the night, you find yourself saying things like, "It gets late so fast!"
7. In your free time, you can be found reading a book or watching TV.
And "Family Feud" is, like, the only thing ever on the Game Show Network.
8. You're forgetful.
Sometimes you legitimately wonder if you have early onset dementia.
9. You hate technology and have a hard time keeping up with what's "cool."
Those crazy kids. What the hell does "bae" mean, again?
10. People always tell you, "You look tired."
You have adopted the personal mantra, "The bags under my eyes are designer."
11. You check the mail religiously.
Even though you never get anything, but junk mail, the prospect of opening the mailbox and finding a handwritten letter just excites you so much.
12. You love board games.
Scrabble is just so much more magical than Words With Friends (and you hate technology so it just works out better this way).
13. And 90 percent of the time, you would describe your mood as "grumpy."
You just can't figure out why people and things are so annoying.
14. Your go-to line is, "I'm so tired."
Even if you have had plenty of sleep, you're still dead to the world and grumpy because of it.
15. You are lame, but unapologetic.
You DGAF. That's what the kids are saying these days, right?
