I recently celebrated the one year mark since I started officially dating my boyfriend. I'm sure you can imagine the onslaught of questions I received from our peers. "How do you keep the romance alive?" "You're not tired of each other yet?" It made me realize how much of a novelty it has become for people of my generation to date, and be committed to one another for more than a weekend.
One year may seem like a long time to some people, but anyone who is lucky enough to hit that first milestone knows certain things to be true by this point.
Side note: we both like Muppets.
1. You're best friends.
Inside jokes, constant texting, sharing a straw, drunk stories, maybe even sacrificing watching a movie you want to watch for one they want to watch, you've learned that you're best friends willing to take the steps lovers do.
2. You hate being apart.
You text them five minutes after they leave saying you miss them and can't wait to see them again, and whenever you're apart for more than a few days it's relentless FaceTime calls and Snapchats of whatever you're eating just to brag but also wishing they were there to share it.
3. You know each other's preferences.
At this point, you can walk into any restaurant and know what they're going to order before they do. You can guess what they're going to wear depending on the occasion, and you know what songs to skip on your playlist. Or blast them just to be annoying.
4. You've disagreed.
Arguments happen, maybe even fights, but after a year of it you learn how to work through it. Arguments can strengthen you, if they are handled properly. (If you're handling it with food bribery, you're handling it properly.)
5. You're each other's best support system.
You have each other's unyielding support in all aspects of life, from deciding what job to apply for, to the weird workout phase, to random decisions quit nursing school to become a wildlife handler in the wilds of Africa and live with the elephants. *cough*
6. You've come to terms with food.
Food was your first love, but now it's found a special place between you and your partner in your relationship. After a year you have both argued about where to eat, worn yourselves out trying to figure out where to eat, tried new foods, and know each other's bizarre food preferences. My boyfriend knows to take me to sushi, but not a seafood place, for example. I know.
7. You've adventured.
It doesn't matter where you live, if you date someone for over a year you've done at least some traveling together. Maybe it was as simple as a road trip to the mountains or a camping trip, or just a long drive to the beach. Traveling together has given you new stories to tell, new dorky couple pictures, and a chance to spend enough time in a confined space together to figure out how much you can really stand each other.
8. You've grown together.
You can look back at the people you were a year ago and it's almost shocking. You've grown tremendously as individuals and as a couple. Your love has grown stronger, your attraction has grown stronger, your ability to hog the bedsheets on a cold enough to freeze over hell night has grown stronger.
9. You're a part of the family.
Your family loves them, and their family loves you. You've probably had a grandparent or two ask when the wedding is going to be at some form of social gathering. But this was the most important step because if the family didn't approve, they would've been gone after month two.
10. You're comfortable.
Neither of you have any problem singing as loud as possible in the car, or ugly crying in front of each other or have deep conversations about existentialism or the existence of a moral truth at 3 a.m.
11. They're a part of you.
Get up in the morning? Text them. See a cute dog? Take a pic and send it to them. Eat phenomenal pie? Save a piece to share with them. You've hit a point where you can't do a damn thing without thinking about them.
12. You can't imagine yourself without them.
At this point you're not entirely sure who exactly you'd be without them. Probably hungry and binge watching Netflix shows. Which is pretty much who you are now- you just get to share it with someone you love, which makes everything all the better.
It's been a year of adventures and laughter, and more love than I ever thought possible. I'm thrilled that I've been so blessed to know someone like him, to call him mine, and to share what we've discovered after a year to others.
Happy Valentine's Day.
