Ah, morning… the birds are chirping, the sunlight is shining, and you are newly refreshed and energized. You're ready to begin a brand new day. Except, that’s not reality. This is:
1. Waking up. You just don’t want to. Somehow your bed becomes more comfortable than it was when you were trying to fall asleep.
2. Toothpaste falling on your hair. Unfortunately for you, you won’t notice until noon. At this point, you’ve been to the coffee shop twice and you’ve attended at least one meeting or class.
3. Using the restroom. If you have a penis, we’re sure you’ve covered the walls in urine, but if you have a vagina, at this point, you’ve fallen into the toilet because you’re not conscious enough to check for the toilet seat. A simple “ew” will suffice for this unfortunate situation.
4. The hangover. Ah yes, waking up at 5 AM and realizing you can’t take Ibuprofen until you’ve eaten, but you can’t eat until 9AM, when the dining halls open. The struggle is real.
5. The walk of shame. It’s shameful, but most unfortunately, you’re walking. It’s 20 degrees, and no, you did not bring your jacket to the party.
6. Beer goggles. You only realize they’re real when you wake up next to the 10 you went home with last night, only to realize they’re a 2.
7. Getting out of bed too quickly. Yes, there’s such a thing, and it’s awful. Your head feels fuzzy, you seem out of place, and it most likely results in an awful, temporarily incurable headache.
8. Realizing that the worries of yesterday are still the worries of today. It’s simple, you, unfortunately, can’t escape your responsibilities.
9. Unforeseen noises. In the morning, you expect your alarm clock to wake you up. You don’t like it, but you expect it. Unfortunately, you don’t expect to find, or rather hear, your roommate learning how to perfect a very loud Australian accent, new construction right beside your building, nor do you expect the quite unfortunate, quite unnecessary, and quite loud noises made by your exercise-fanatic neighbor, who can’t seem to find the gym (IT IS A 5-MINUTE WALK ACROSS CAMPUS AND IT IS FREE). Instead, they loudly play Eye of the Tiger, while loudly getting fit. At least they'll be hot, right?
10. The morning face. Your crush lives in your hall. You ran into them. Enough said.
11. Realizing there’s no coffee. What’s worse than having to prepare for the day? Realizing you don’t have the most essential ingredient—coffee.
12. Waking up tired. Finally, to put the icing on the cake, the worst thing that happens in the morning is waking up feeling worse than when you went to sleep. Waking up tired is an indication that you haven’t had the sleep you deserve. Your sleep cycle is messed up and so are you.
