Disneyland Withdrawal (n.): The time in between Disneyland trips when all you can do is think, watch, sleep, eat, and breathe Disney.
Whether you've just visited a week ago or haven't been to the park in months, Disneyland Withdrawal is a real condition, causing Disney to completely take over your life. Have no fear! You're not alone in your despair. You just have to recognize the symptoms in time:
Stage 1: Marathoning Disney movies.
It's a Friday night, and you can think of nothing better to do than to gather up some close friends, fire up the popcorn and Red Vines, and watch Disney movies back-to-back for the next eight hours. Need access to your Disney movies at any time on any device? Welcome to Disney Movies Anywhere, where you can quench your addiction.
Stage 2: Singing Disney songs nonstop.
Any real life situation calls Disney lyrics to mind. You can't help it; you can't think of anything else! Possible examples of nonstop Disney singing:
1. Singing "Almost There" as you near the end of a 15-page paper.
2. Singing "Let it Go" when your roommate asks you about the empty tub of ice cream -- which you may or may not have eaten during your Disney marathon.
3. Singing "Hakuna Matata" after your last class of the week. No worries for the rest of your days! Well, at least the next two days...
4. Singing "Friend Like Me" when bringing your roommate a Starbucks coffee (to make up for the ice cream, of course).
Stage 3: Listening to the Disneyland soundtrack.
No, I don't mean songs from Disney movies; Stage 3 causes people to progress to listening to ride soundtracks, so that they can feel like they're back on a high-thrill rollercoaster in outer space or taking an exhilarating jeep ride through the temple of the forbidden eye. Whether you want to listen to the Tomorrowland-area ambiance or the Pirates of the Caribbean ride music, here's a playlist to transport you back to the park.
Stage 4: Quoting rides in everyday conversation.
At this point, the withdrawal has taken over your speech abilities. Every time you open the door you say, "Welcome, foolish mortals!" When a friend gets into your car, you immediately say, "Please keep your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the ride at all times." Every time you take a sip of your drink, you say, "Drink up me hearties, yo ho!" And don't even get me started on the Jungle Cruise jokes...
Stage 5: Researching Splash Mountain Pictures.
As any Disney aficionado knows, all pictures taken on rides must be carefully choreographed, in hopes of being added to the Splash Mountain wall of fame. At this point, you're furiously researching for your next trip, seeing what past legends have done to create the most epic pictures of all time.
Stage 6: Watching Jedi Training Academy videos.
Watching a Jedi Training Academy video, you recall that special moment when the Jedi master picked you out in the crowd, gave you a robe and lightsaber, and taught you how to battle the forces of evil. Darth Vader, escorted by an entourage of Stormtroopers, challenged you to a one-on-one duel, and, summoning the force, you defeated him and made your Jedi master proud!
Stage 7: Obsessively following Disney Instagram accounts.
If you can't be at Disneyland yourself, you love to get daily updates from the twenty Disney-themed Instragram accounts you follow. You smile contently as you view an image of the Matterhorn at sunset, or the adorable moment when Pluto met a service dog. Need more Disney accounts to follow? Try Disneyland Celebrity Sightings, where you might catch your favorite celebrity strolling around Main Street.
Stage 8: Recreating the Disney culinary experience.
Don't blame yourself for spending the same amount of money on your ticket and on your food the last time you visited. Disney food is just that darn delicious! In this stage, you are determined to recreate the flavors of Disneyland, from Dole whip to Matterhorn macaroons. If you're on the hunt for as many recipes as you can possibly get your hands on, read the Disney Food Blog, and create an all-Disney meal for yourself.
Stage 9: Spiraling down the vortex of Disney quizzes.
If you've spent over three hours taking quiz after quiz on Oh My Disney, you need to admit that you have a problem. On the bright side, at least you know that the Disney attraction which most reflects your life is Pirates of the Caribbean, your Disney boyfriend is Flynn Rider, and you can correctly identify any Disney movie from the opening castle.
Stage 10: Mastering all of the Disney trivia you can find.
You're officially the know-it-all for all things Disney, and you drop Disney trivia into all of your conversations whenever possible. No, I didn't know that the purple teacup spins the fastest or that you can actually hold a wedding inside the park. And no, I didn't know it only cost $3.50 to get into the park when it first opened, which is the same amount it costs to buy a pretzel in the park now! Someone get me a time machine!
Stage 11: Depleting your wallet because you're buying so much Disney merchandise.
After all of this heart-wrenching Disney watching, singing, and eating, you can't help but online-shop your heart out over Disney items you didn't know you needed. My, those Haunted Mansion bookends look lovely on your shelf! Wow, I can smell that Main Street Bakery candle from here! And is that a Rebel Alliance Alex and Ani bracelet?! Please tell me you didn't buy the Cinderella slippers...
Stage 12: The final takeover.
You have a built-in Disney radar. If anyone so much as says the word "joy," you rave about how "Inside Out" was one of the best Pixar movies of all time. You frantically find every source of media that has anything to do with Disney, including re-watching the episode of "Modern Family" when the Pritchett-Dunphy clan visits the beloved park. You look back at old Disneyland pictures, admire your autograph book, and dust off your pin collection. You wear your Disney ears around the house, and quote the Star Tours ride by heart. If anyone mentions Anaheim, you start to cry. Everything is Disney!
If you believe that you're suffering from Disneyland Withdrawal, there's only one cure: Get yourself to the Happiest Place on Earth A.S.A.P., and have a magical day. Repeat as needed!
