In my 20 years of living, I have learned one thing to be true about society; Ikea rules everything around us. Many of us don't realize it, mainly due to the fact that Ikea has done such a great job at masterfully concealing itself into our every day lives. The chair, bed or couch that you are currently seated upon is most likely from Ikea. I, personally, love Ikea and am guilty to falling trap to their amazing deals and emporium of show rooms. I love their delicious Swedish meatballs, frozen yogurt and cinnamon rolls. I even love the smell of Ikea. However, there is one thing that even I know Ikea is guilty of.
Ikea, you are guilty of lying. You are able to hide behind your ridiculously cheap prices, cute logos and perfectly placed show rooms. Your seemingly simple furniture fools naive people into believing that their two drawer dresser or twin bed frame can be built in an hour and without tears. The cute "pillsbury dough"-esque people on the instruction manuals become your worst enemy, mocking you with their smiles. Having just built Ikea furniture myself, I decided it would only be suitable to highlight the emotional stages that one person endures whilst building Ikea furniture.
1. Beginning your journey with ambition and inspiration.
2. Laying out the pieces of wood and suddenly becoming cripplingly intimidated.
3. Gaining some hope from the happy cartoon man on your manual.
4. Realizing you misread the directions in the first 10 minutes of building.
5. Hitting early onset anger, desperation and defeat.
6. Questioning why there are no words at all on the entire manual or why the pieces of wood aren't labeled.
A simple "1, 2, 3" is all I'm asking for.
7. Hitting an even lower point when one of you pieces of wood breaks.
8. Or, when the slats on your bed don't fit.
9. Debating whether you even need any furniture at all.
10. Questioning why you didn't just pay someone to do this.
11. Hitting the point of determination to finish what you started.
Ikea will not beat you.
12. Admiring and treating your newly finished furniture like a new born child, knowing that it could break at any moment.
