I, along with the rest of my fellow Armstrong State students, did not apply to attend, pay tuition to attend, or agree to merge with Georgia Southern. Jokes aside, here are some things I think we'd all rather do than abandon the university that's given us so much.
1. Sit in stand-still traffic for two days
2. Pour scalding hot Cup Of Noodles on my chest
3. Listen to Nickelback
4. Set my house on fire
5. Set myself on fire
6. Be Meredith Grey
7. Drop my iPhone without its case
8. Smash my Macbook with a sledgehammer
9. Drive into a pond
10. Go outside naked during a blizzard
11. Buy a Samsung Galaxy S7
12. Like the person I'm stalking on social media's photo from April 7, 2011
13. Eat Vaseline
14. Get chicken pox
15. Break my leg
16. Break my tailbone
17. Drive for longer than two hours
18. Sit through another math class
19. Use Bing as my primary search tool
20. Get caught using Wikipedia
21. Get caught plagiarizing
22. Cut my hair
23. Pay a really big ticket
24. Drink coffee right after it's brewed
25. Eat potatoes straight out of the oven
26. Never shave my legs again
27. Rip my fingernails off
28. Slam my leg in a door
29. Speak publicly
30. Correct my professors on how my name is pronounced
31. Eat dog food
32. Never eat cheese again
33. Be limited on how much cheese I can eat
34. Rewatch the ending of "How I Met You Mother" over and over again
35. Be the kids from "A Series Of Unfortunate Events"
36. See another article about the Kardashian/Jenners
37. Buy all my course textbooks and only use them twice
38. Gouge my eyes out
39. Put too much mousse in my hair
40. Buy $1,000 in lottery tickets and lose on each one
41. Go to school without pants
42. Get a really bad perm
43. Step on a Lego
44. Eat raw chicken
45. Give up cookies
46. Shave my cat
47. Give my cat a bath
48. Shave my eyebrows off
49. Drink out of a public toilet
50. Read the Dictionary in full
51. Proceed to read the Thesaurus in full
52. Wear jeans all day, everyday
53. Never eat sea food again
54. Wear the same nail polish forever
55. Rip out my belly ring
56. Sit on spikes
57. Go on a date with Collin Kaepernick
58. Fart in front of a hundred people
59. Lose my Pirate Card
60. Use up my entire printing allowance
61. Visit North Korea
62. Dance like no one is watching, when everyone is watching
63. Play the knife game and lose
64. Go to the DMV
65. Let my boyfriend do my makeup
66. Let my boyfriend cut my hair
67. Go to the gym without headphones
68. Go to the gym during rush hour
69. Eat ketchup straight from the bottle
70. Shave my legs and accidentally cut my heels
71. Run out of gas
72. Stop painting
73. Never watch my favorite movie again
74. Get holes in all my pairs of socks
75. Break out
76. Run out of my favorite perfume and then have it discontinued
77. Wear underwear that's too tight
78. Watch "Two and A Half Men"
79. Laugh with liquids in my mouth and have them spray out of my nose
80. Grow a mustache
81. Let someone tickle me
82. Be fed by a momma bird
83. Dissect a frog
84. Listen to another tax commercial about delayed tax returns
85. Get tackled by Gronkowski
86. Watch a Cowboy's game
87. Watch the Cowboy's win the super bowl
89. Poke myself in the eye when my makeup looks really good
90. Be the main characters in an American Horror Story season
91. Buy a car at 19% interest
92. Write a five-page essay 10 minutes before class
93. Watch Family Guy every day on repeat
94. Sleep with no air conditioning
95. Punch myself in the face
96. Grab a hot pan with nothing but my hand
97. Listen to a GSU student tell me that I "can't get into" their university
98. Drop out of college
99. Listen to a GSU student talk about how Armstrong is gone for 5 hours
100. Literally anything
