Long distance relationships are extremely hard. It's difficult to know how to exactly approach each other. Here are some tips that work for me, on how to approach a long distance relationship and make it work:
Schedule a time to visit and stick to it.
This is one thing I personally have to work on. Schedule a time with your partner that works best for the both of you to visit. Maybe take turns visiting each other and discuss expenses. If it’s too difficult to visit all the time, try planning at least one visit to give each other something to look forward to.
Send random care packages or letters.
The best thing to come home to is a package or a piece of mail from your significant other. It doesn’t have to be anything big or expensive, something as simple as a handwritten letter can go a long way.
FaceTime or talk on the phone whenever possible.
Talking and hearing each other’s voices is a lot more meaningful than texting 24/7. I also need to work on this myself, we both end up happier and healthier after getting off the phone with each other. Hearing your significant others' voice can help with the distance.
Don't be upset if he/she is busy.
We all have lives and we all have things that we need to do. Don't be upset when something comes up and your partner is busy with something. As a college student, I have tons of homework, classes, and sorority commitments that cause me to be unable to talk to my boyfriend all the time. We have come to an understanding that I have things I need to do, sometimes I need a break from texting all day. He has things that cause him to be busy as well. Partners don't have to text or be communicating with each other all day. A break is nice every once in a while, especially if you've discussed everything there is to talk about.
Communicate with each other.
This goes along with the two above, but communication is key. Let each other know when things get busy rather than just not replying to a text message. If you have plans that will cause you to be unable to chat, let your partner know. Everyone would prefer to know a head of time if something is going on, rather than it being thrown at them. If you’re in an argument try to call each other and talk things out because a lot of emotions could be lost in texts and things could also be taken the wrong way. If you are feeling a certain way about something, make sure your partner knows about it and don’t be silent if something is wrong. Communication is a huge factor in a normal relationship but it is even more of one in a long distance relationship.
Don’t dwell about missing your significant other.
This is extremely hard to do, but one always feels worse when they’re constantly thinking about how much they miss their partner. Everyone copes with things differently, something to do is to get up and get your mind off of it. At first, you might want to look at pictures or think of memories but sometimes it just makes you miss them even more and feel worse. If that works for you, go ahead and do it. Owning something of the others also can help with this. It could be something as little as a hair tie, a sweatshirt, or something that is sentimental. I own plenty of my boyfriend’s clothes and whenever I miss him I just stick one on to make me feel closer to him.
Play online games with each other.
If possible, play online games with each other through apps or other forms of technology. It’s nice knowing that you both are doing something together. It makes you feel a little closer to your partner even though you’re miles apart. Playing games also allows you to have some fun together and can bring you closer.
Stay honest with each other.
Talk about your feelings and why you’re feeling them. If you feel like giving up, let your significant other know. Try and figure out why you feel this way by working together. Discuss each other’s motivations, separations, and never try to deal with things by yourself. Your partner will be able to tell when something is wrong. Don’t bottle yourself up for the sake of sparing their feelings. Be honest and lay everything on the table, allowing problems and feelings to be solved.
Stay positive.
Keeping positivity in the relationship allows for negativity to rarely be present. Remind yourself that you’re staying together because you see a future together. Keep positive about working through it and creating that future. Things may be difficult but they will be worth it.
TRUST EACH OTHER.
Trust is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. If there is no trust, it is extremely hard to work together and have a confident relationship. Trust your partner until they give you a reason not to trust them. Don’t ask 50 questions about one’s day or what they’re doing. If you’ve had problems in the past about trusting people, make sure your partner knows and you can work on it together. There really is no such thing as a serious relationship without trust.
