As an incoming freshman at Johns Hopkins, I'm excited to dive into Baltimore with my future classmates. Fortunately for them, I've lived here all my life, so I can share a little knowledge about the city.
1. Killer humidity.
Most people don't know that Satan actually just funnels Baltimore's summer weather down into hell through a ventilation shaft. The heat would be bearable on its own, but the humidity is horrific. If you're outside for any length of time, you will sweat. Air conditioning is a must.
2. SPORTS!
We love our Orioles and Ravens. Almost too much, actually. We're extremely passionate about our teams. When the Ravens make the playoffs (year after year!) we paint the town purple, and for Baltimoreans, the date that lives in infamy is March 29, 1984. Oh, and don't walk around wearing a Steelers jersey…
3. Street smarts.
Despite what you may have heard elsewhere (*cough* The Wire *cough*), you probably won't get shot walking through the city. That being said, don't walk down a dark alley alone at night with all your valuables out for everyone to see. Street smarts are critical!
4. Baltimore? More like Smalltimore.
When someone asks you where you went to school, they do not mean college, they mean high school. You can probably connect any two Baltimore locals with each other in six steps or less. For an urban city of over 600,000, Baltimore can feel like quite the small town.
5. Old Bay Seasoning.
It is socially acceptable and encouraged to put Old Bay on anything – crabs, seafood, fries, mac & cheese, chicken, onion rings, you name it! It is the most important and delicious seasoning known to man.
6. Steamed crabs.
On a related note, you will learn how to properly eat crabs, and you will enjoy them. There's no consensus best place in town, but as long as you're not wearing white (trust me, it's a bad idea), you'll have a great time eating crabs with friends anywhere.
7. Natty Boh, hon!
Even though it's not brewed here anymore, National Bohemian Beer is a staple of Baltimore culture. When you go get crabs, you get a pitcher of Natty Boh with them. There is never a wrong time for Natty Boh.
8. A city of neighborhoods.
It's a tad cliché, but it really is true. The Baltimore you experience in Roland Park (pictured above) is very different from the Baltimore you experience in Mt. Vernon, which is very different from the Baltimore you experience in the Inner Harbor. There's something for everyone here, as long as you know where to look!
9. Welcome to “Baldimore."
The Baltimore accent is an unfortunate reality of life. Here in “Baldimore" we drink “wooder" instead of water, and rather than go down to Ocean City, we prefer “goin' downy ocean." I apologize in advance for our bastardization of the English language.
10. Charm City pride.
Maybe it's because of how most Americans see Baltimore, but we Baltimoreans have so much pride for our city. Baltimore is far more than just a run down pit stop on the way to DC! Every city has its problems, and Baltimore is no exception, but we really love Charm City!
