My roommate weighs 86 pounds... You read that correctly. Eighty-six. She's only 5'5", so she's a healthy weight for her size and is the most adorable tiny human in the whole world. However, I don't even want to think about how many Delanie's (my roommate) it would take to make a whole Katie (me).
That being said, she has no concept of what it is like to be fat. She literally cannot fathom having love handles and a muffin top. The idea confounds her. So this article is for people who want to see how the bigger half lives.
1. The word "fat" does not bother most fat people.
Most people don't want it to be a nickname, but if it comes up in a conversation we would rather be called "fat" than overweight or obese.
2. If we make a joke about our weight, it's supposed to be funny. So do not respond with, "You're not fat... You're beautiful..."
I called myself a baby beluga, I did not say that I wasn't a freaking adorable beluga...
3. Don't assume that we don't love ourselves.
Just because our jean sizes may be bigger, it doesn't mean we don't love all that junk in that trunk.
4. Don't try to tell us what to eat.
You're not the boss of me and if I want to eat an entire quart of ice cream during finals week, I will.
5. When you talk about how "fat" you are, our eyes roll on their own (we have literally no control because even our eyes are fatter than you)
6. We hate shopping with you.
We shop at completely different places because sometimes Rue 21 and American Eagle just don't cut it.
7. We have to try WAY harder than everyone else.
Because we weigh more, people assume if they see us in sweats with a messy bun that we're a slob. So when it takes me more than twenty minutes to get ready, don't be upset; it's so people judge us less.
8. We are the conduit through which guys hit on our friends.
And those guys are usually one of our one true loves
9. We are considered the bodyguard of our friend group because we're the most intimidating.
If the fat friend isn't happy, nobody's happy.
10. For some reason, the fat friends are always the ones with the most confidence (meaning we also supply the moral support)
Your fat friend is the glue that holds your friend-group together. Appreciate us before we lose weight or marry a male model and move to Cuba.
